Do You Have A Weird Pizza Eating Habit?

J. Kenji Lopez-Alt

My wife is charming in many ways. One of them is her habit of leaving her favorite bit of a meal until the very end. This is particularly charming to me because it means that long after the two strips of bacon have made the short journey from my plate to my belly, there are still two perfectly good strips sitting on the other side of the table. I usually spend the second half of brunch honing my already top-notch distracting skills while attempting to liberate her bacon strips from the cruel fate of going cold before being consumed.

My wife also has this odd theory about circular foods, which is this: The center is always the best part.

Sometimes you don't notice how this affects her eating habits. She eats a peach or sucks a lollypop from the outside in, just like any normal person does. Hamburgers are a bit strange. She starts by taking a bite just like you or me. But she'll continue biting around the edge in concentric circles until all that's left is a cork-shaped plug of burger from the very center, which she then enjoys immensely. (I've tried stealing this last bite with only limited success.)

Pizza slices are where it gets really weird. See, despite the fact that they're triangular, the tip is still technically the center of a larger circle, so true to form she must consume it from the outside in (with copious amounts of crushed red pepper, no less). This means that a) you'll never see my wife leave behind and pizza crusts, as she must first eat them before she can even fathom moving on towards the center, and b) she goes through a lot of napkins as she precariously balances the slice on the fingertips of two hands once she is forced to lift it (god forbid any of those precious pepper flakes should tumble off).

If the New York Fold is the neatest, easiest way to eat pizza with your hands, then the Reverse Two-Hand Balance is surely the most complicated.

All of this is really just a long winded way to poke a little bit of fun at my wife, and to ask you guys: Do you have any strange pizza eating habits?

Come on, I know you've got'em.