It's pretty rare that Serious Eaters have a bone to pick with Trader Joe's. The grocery chain practices good grammar, is especially considerate to grandmas, and is sorta like Disney World, only better. But when it starts stocking frozen avocado halves, we may have a problem.
According to Mike Hess of True/Slant, the shrink-wrapped halves are no bigger than limes (first mistake). And when turned into guacamole, the outcome is "a pasty, gritty, flavorless and textureless blob of shame." Joe can do many wonderful things, but he should have left this one alone. Stick with the frozen dumplings, man.