Best Non-Pork alternative to Bacon?

Being jewish,I never ate pork in my life and don't plan on it. I am not really stricly kosher about anything else (I do mix meat and dairy...I know,I'm a kosher-poser) except shellfish.

As a foodie/at-home chef,I am constantly reminded at how great bacon would be in every dish. I'm tired of it. I'm sure there's nothing like it and I'm sure I'm missing out. However,I'm very principaled and won't give in,especially something completely unknown to me.

What is a great non-pork alternative to bacon?

Please don't say anything that ends in the word bacon like (turkey or chicken) because even I know that's not as good as real bacon. There's got to be something better out there than processed dark meat turkey/chicken thighs.....Help me out swinees!

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