If you're as big a football fan as I am, you'd know that the Super Bowl is just around the corner and it's time to start planning snacks as our favorite players start oiling their mitts, sharpening their skates, and adjusting their gear-shifts in preparation for that day when they finally meet face-to-face on the diamond for a cage match to the...
Who am I kidding? I don't even know the rules of football, much less who's playing or who's gonna win. That said, I do enjoy game day for one reason: snacks. What other day of the year do we have to devote ourselves entirely to dippable, lickable, no-utensils required fare without anyone giving us a reproachful look or scornful glance?
Let's be honest here. Super Bowl day is all about celebrating athleticism—speed, agility, and raw human power—in other people by being as goddamned lazy as we can possibly be. Let the guys on the TV run their butts off, our butts are going to be firmly ensconced in our couches, our dippables, sippables, and commestibles stationed at arms reach, our only exercise for the day coming from the inevitable trips to the latrine (though I 've no doubt that there are enterprising American visionaries hard at work solving that issue).
So who wants to start off America's laziest day by doing some hard graft in the kitchen? Sorry—Super Bowl snacks should be as easy to make as they are delicious.
Seeing as hummus is the official snack of the NSFPWKNAF,* it only made sense to me to come up with a few variations with which to sparkle it up. Most require no more than a minute or two of chopping and stirring. Some require a visit to the food processor. One requires boiling a pot of water, but we named it B'ummus to compensate. A few have meat in them. All are delicious and will work equally well with store-bought or homemade hummus.
*The National Society For People Who Know Nothing About Football, Presided over by Founder and Dictator-For-Life J. Kenji López-Alt.
15 Ways to Eat Hummus
- Homemade Hummus, our basic, balanced recipe.
- Pine nuts, Parsley and Lemon Juice, classic and delicious.
- Tzatzummus, tzatziki, meet hummus!
- Sun-dried Tomatoes and Basil, a taste of California.
- B'ummus, bright red, funny sounding, delicious.
- Muffalummus, hummus' Creole cousin.
- Hot Bacon Hummus, do people still go for bacon anything?
- Spicy Black Bean Hummus, it'll knock your socks off.
- Chipotle Lime Hummus, be careful, it bites!
- Figs, Pepitas, and Smoked Paprika, a little sweet, a little nutty.
- Spinach and Feta Hummus, original? No. Delicious? You betcha!
- Tuna and Olive Hummus, something's fishy here.
- Harissa and Mint, another classic pair.
- Artichokes and Herbs, lots of herbs, lots of 'chokes.
- Za'atar, tangy and herbal.
- Pastrummus, yes, it is what you think it is.