"Nobody gets to see me up close and personal with my scale."
A few days ago my wife asked if I was about to take a shower in our bathroom. I said I was, but first I had to weigh myself. I walked over to Will's bathroom, where Thinner lives. My wife followed right behind me.
Just as I was about to open the door to Thinner's one room abode, my wife asked the question no serious dieter wants to hear: "I want to see what you weigh. Can I watch you get on the scale?"
"Are you kidding," I said, knowing she wasn't kidding at all. "Absolutely not. Nobody gets to see me up close and personal with my scale. Nobody comes between me and my Thinner."
"What's the difference if I see what you weigh now or Friday when you post your weight on Serious Eats?" she said.
Vicky didn't understand. It's not a matter of when she sees what I weigh. Rather, it's a matter of principle. The Serious Diet Weigh-In Privacy Principle.
I regard my relationship with Thinner as an intensely private one. I know Thinner and Thinner knows me. Thinner has known me when I weighed 265 pounds, when he could have made fun of me—but never did. And Thinner has known me when I have weighed 212. Thinner never judges me, and I never judge him. We have literally known each other through thick (fat) and thin. Thinner accepts my current bit of backsliding without ever saying a word.
He never has to. In this case and in Thinner's case, numbers, not actions, speak much louder than words. This week I am apprehensive about Thinner's pronouncement.
We went to Boston to visit friends. I didn't even think about bringing Thinner along, but I should have. Our friends Vicky and Tom indulged my every food whim in Beantown.
We had a fabulous dinner on Friday night in Cambridge at the Hungry Mother. Carefully cooked Southern food informed by classic French cooking techniques. Saturday we visited Flour Bakery, stopped by Sportello for a few, mostly tasty take-out tidbits, had an extraordinary lunch at Barbara Lynch's B & G Oysters: Lobster BLT, fantastic fried clams with great French fries, lovely bowl of chowder, and a fine lobster roll. Saturday night we had an excellent dinner at Ming Tsai's Blue Ginger in Wellesley. At every meal I tried to just taste everything we ordered, but I would say I was semi-successful in that regard.
We arrived home on the Megabus Sunday night, when I met Adam and Claire at Colicchio & Sons for pizza night. The pizza there is ultra-light, but I just couldn't face Thinner on Monday, so I didn't step on him until Tuesday.
I was pretty much under control the rest of the week, but I think the weekend sunk my chances of losing weight. We shall see right now: 224. Up a pound. Not pretty, and certainly not anything I'd like my wife to see in person. I have made a decision to share my struggles with my weight on Serious Eats, but that doesn't mean I want anyone to see me getting on Thinner. That, my friends, is between me and Thinner and the weight gods.
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