Serious Eats - seriouseats.com

Create is great and yes, the ads are horrifying. Most of the cooking shows are good but sometimes they have that Christina woman and her healthy food and I can't stand her! I can't stand to be lectured and I can't stand to be talked down to and when I watch her, that's what I feel like she's doing.

I have never been able to watch Nancy sew for reasons that have nothing to do with her face - she just bores the pants off me. I'm pretty sure she's not "stroked-out" because whatever is wrong with her face has been going on for years and years but it has gotten much worse. Honestly, when I first saw her I thought it was my imagination because it was so subtle. Then recently I saw how much it's progressed and felt bad for her.

lemonfair - totally agree

it sounds as if the problem is as much how his pickiness presents itself Vs the actual fact of the pickiness.
you need to negotiate how he goes about tasting and reacting. instead of filling his plate hiding the uneaten, he should take a bite only, then only take more of what he will actually eat. He also must accept that if he rejects what's for dinner, he makes his own substitute.

You, OTOH, have to deal with adjusting your daily cooking to reflect some of his opinions. Cooking can be fun, but the day in day out feeding of your partner & family isn't so much about the fun for you as about the fact that people need to eat. Plus, if he rejects your food in favor or cornflakes or PBJ for days on end, you can't be hurt.

if you someday are having kids, he needs to have learned to reject in a low-key fashion so as not to 'teach' his pickiness to them. I won't go so far as to expect him to sometimes noticeable eat something he is known to dislike, to model polite behaviour. But it would be handy.

PS I was in a relationship in which we had very different food cultures. our inability to appreciate each others standards was but one of many problems. But 3 times a day one or both of of us being annoyed or mad or disappointed sure didn't help. If you cant fine some way to enjoy meals together, some compromises, then hang it up now.

We all have our food preferences. I don't like fruit mixed with foods that are supposed to be savory, savory stuff with raisins, or chocolate mixed with fruit (though separately, I love them both). Other than that, I'll eat anything at least once, maybe twice (I believe it second chances for everyone and everything). I think the thing that bothers you the most is that he doesn't share your passion for food and he doesn't want to even try. The point is: can you live with this? or will it be a thorn in your side that digs deeper with time? If you can't make peace with yourself on this, then walk away. If you can deal with it and have it not affect your dignity and self-worth, then I don't see that it's a real problem.

Every person you meet and get along with very well isn't necessarily your mate. Food is something you will be sharing with this person for life, 3 times a day plus snacks. Not to mention favorite holiday treats... that adds up to a lot of things you won't be sharing, possibly even arguing about. You love to cook, and may see food as love. His constant rejection of your offerings and likes may over time wear like water dripping on stone and erode love and respect. A very long list of verboten foods is a whole different thing than not caring for a few things. Stay friends if possible but think long and hard about developing more intimacy.
BUT- utimately it's your life, your choice.

I think if you were really crazy about this person, his food habits wouldn't bother you as much. And, vice-versa, he would make an attempt to be more adventurous.

My husband was a picky eater when we first started dating. Over time, he's broadened his horizons food-wise, and I save the things he really won't eat to savor when I'm having a meal without him. A good compromise, I think.

I'm sorta torn. To some extent I do agree with tapioca. If food is your passion then there is no real way it's going to work out (and you kinda knew that). I am sorta dealing with the same thing, but the exception is that it's only a couple of things and of those things the problem is that he has eaten canned versions and not fresh versions. So I am slowly converting him. I'm still working on cucumbers and pickles - he's German can you imagine him not liking pickles, isn't there some rule about pickled food and Germans. Anyway - if it were a few things then I'd work around it but he seems pickey like a child and for me that's a big red flag.
Years ago someone told me that you can tell everything about a person by what they eat...she was so right

At this stage of a relationship, I dump this guy faster than a hot potato. For anyone who is a subscriber to Serious Eats, food is important (along with wine and other stuff). So connect with someone that shares this passion not someone who is going to disparage or pick at everything you love about food. Get to the core of the issue and stop fretting about symptoms.

Chef Wannabee

@WannabeTVchef - Food allergies are hardly rare. According to the American Academy of Allergy Asthma and Immunology, approximately 12 million people (or about 1 in 25) have food allergies. And that's allergies alone, not sensitivities or intolerances (like lactose intolerance). While a list of 8 foods cause about 90% of food allergies, who are you to judge what is a 'real' allergy. Obviously not a medical professional with the training to diagnose someone's immune disorder.

I've seen someone swell up like a balloon when a server didn't know the correct answer to if there was garlic in a dish. And personally, I'd love to eat raw tomatoes, but paying for that fantastic salsa with a blistered tongue is not a price I'm ok with.

It depends of course on just how picky someone is but for the most part, yes it is a deal breaker. I mean someone with acid reflux is one thing or extreme lactose intolerence but when they are the type to special order everything every time they eat out I have no patience. Also I have no patience with "food alergy" person who seems to have an alergy to everything an adult should eat like mushrooms or spinach. Food alergies are very, VERY rare and some of the ones I've heard (garlic allergy, onion allergy) just do not exist. Nut allergies, shellfish allergies, these are real and they are dangerous but please don't tell me that you are allergic to tomatoes and then soak your fries in ketchup.

My husband and I have been married for almost 26 years. When we started dating, almost 30 years ago, he came from a "Hamburger Helper" household and I came from a gourmet / European household. He was never quite sure what he was going to be served at my parents, but he was always game. While my side of the family introduced him to strange things like broccoli (WITHOUT cheese sauce) and asparagus, I will have to admit that he introduced me to kool-aid slushies and toasted pb & js.

His job has taken him all over the world and he is more than happy to try anything that is put in front of him. Our kids are the same way - they will try anything.

It's a tough call. Is he willing to be educated? If not, your meals are going to be pretty sucky.

Yes, it's an absolute deal breaker!

From your post, it seems clear that you care about food. If you think the BF is a keeper, you need to explain to him how important it is for him to try the foods you like. Marriages have lots of tough spots and if you're not in the same place food-wise (which you care about), it's tough to see how this relationship will work long-term. If he's willing to try things, but still doesn't like it, that's one thing. But it sounds like you're a long way away from that place.