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From Talk

Paying for someone else's party?

This practice has been a pet peeve for years. However I take it even further. If you are going to give a party, GIVE the party. Simply having cake and ice cream is better than asking guests to contribute. To call and say, "I'm giving so and so a party. Would you bring _________" is tacky and presumptuous.

When I give a party, I GIVE a party.

From Talk

Where to get fresh morels?

In the woods directly behind my home


In the woods directly behind my home--found some beauties this spring--Just showing off!


From Talk

Suggestions for fresh morels, please!

I love morels sauteed in butter and added to scrambled eggs---so-o-o-o-o-o good.
I gather them in Washington state close to my home. A few years ago we had a winter storm that dropped thousands of trees. The next spring, the morels were so plentiful that I even gave some away (which is like giving away huckleberries, It just doesn't happen)!
A local restaurant uses morels in a cream sauce for chicken.

From Serious Eats

Making Your Own Bagels

I love to make Peter Reinhart's bagels. He's a great teacher and these bagels are simply the best. His focaccia is also outstanding.

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Recent Comments | Response to Comments

From Talk

Paying for someone else's party?

This practice has been a pet peeve for years. However I take it even further. If you are going to give a party, GIVE the party. Simply having cake and ice cream is better than asking guests to contribute. To call and say, "I'm giving so and so a party. Would you bring _________" is tacky and presumptuous.

When I give a party, I GIVE a party.

From Talk

Where to get fresh morels?

In the woods directly behind my home


In the woods directly behind my home--found some beauties this spring--Just showing off!


From Talk

Suggestions for fresh morels, please!

I love morels sauteed in butter and added to scrambled eggs---so-o-o-o-o-o good.
I gather them in Washington state close to my home. A few years ago we had a winter storm that dropped thousands of trees. The next spring, the morels were so plentiful that I even gave some away (which is like giving away huckleberries, It just doesn't happen)!
A local restaurant uses morels in a cream sauce for chicken.

From Serious Eats

Making Your Own Bagels

I love to make Peter Reinhart's bagels. He's a great teacher and these bagels are simply the best. His focaccia is also outstanding.

From Talk

What are your strange, secret and personal cooking tips?

I so totally agree with those who emphasize good, fresh, REAL ingredients. Real dairy--no oleo, no cool whip, etc.
Good luck.
Also, check out Chef John on foodwishes.com. A great food blog!

From Serious Eats

Mixed Review: King Arthur Flour Blueberry Sour Cream Scone Mix

Ditto on the comment from cybercita. Those are really expensive scones.
Working the butter in with a pastry blender works well also.

Speaking of KA mixes, their pie crust mix is advertised in the catalogue (or used to be) as "simply add fat and liquid". Think about how much that flour and salt costs!

From Talk

What's your favorite kitchen gadget?

Kitchen Aid mixer and microplane ----------- hands down

From Serious Eats

Mixed Review: Barefoot Contessa Homemade Marshmallow Mix

marshmallows really are easy to make--so why would anyone spend $11 on a mix?
Homemade are wonderful because they remind me of marshmallows from my childhood. Campfire brand marshmallow came in boxes with each row of marshmallows separated with a waxed paper. They were covered with corn starch.
Store bought marshmallows now are just too airy.

From Serious Eats

Cook the Book: 'Kneadlessly Simple'

Peter Reinhart's focaccia and bagels.

Also, no knead artisan french bread.

From Talk

What time do you eat dinner?

We have dinner precisely between 4:30 and 7:30 every day.

From Talk

Have you ever been snowed in and what did you eat?

Many times when we're snowed in, we also lose electricity. One year we had no power but I did have an unbaked chicken pot pie in the freezer that I baked on the gas barbeque (along with an apple pie).

From Talk

Have you discovered any new amazing foods lately?

Oh nadia! You brought back such great memories. My dad was a milk delivery man and I got to go with him in the summer when I was a pre-teen. it was a tiny town and I loved it!

From Talk

Bread Baking Books

I agree. Peter Reinhart is such a good teacher and his recipes are sterling. Also, Artisan Bread in Five Minutes A Day is also excellent.

From Serious Eats

Mixed Review: Fiber One Premium Apple Cinnamon Muffin Mix

I bought the apple-cinnamon muffins mix at Costco and am now stuck with two packs that I do not want--didn't care for them at all.

From Talk

Baking Bread Question: Help?

Absolutely. Just substitute one for one.

From Talk

What is your foolproof, fallback dessert?

Excuse me but microwave cream pie????? I'll bite also.

From Talk

What is your foolproof, fallback dessert?

I agree that pound cake is a great fall back dessert. I keep some in my freezer at all times because it freezes so well. Besides lemon curd, I also like to serve it with a fruit sauce--usually huckleberry or blackberry and whipped cream.
I also fall back on pie a lot. It's always received well and I'm good at it.

From Talk

What's So Weird About That?

Peanut butter and dill pickle sandwiches--still love them to this day-good to see whatseatingme eats them too.
We also ate, as a treat in the evening, soda crackers with hot tea poured over them and sugar on top.
Oh, and bianca34dw--I think cream cheese and jam IS normal. (and I live in Washington State.

From Recipes

Cook's Illustrated's Foolproof Pie Dough

I finally make this crust. WOW! I've been making good pie crust for 45 years and was absolutely blown away by this one--as was my husband. It youwas beautiful to work with!!

Thank you!

From Talk

Food Blogs?

I can't believe no one has mentioned foodwishes.com with Chef John. It's my personal favorite.

From Recipes

Cook's Illustrated's Foolproof Pie Dough

Forgive this long comment! I'm hoping it will be helpful. My daughter and I made three savory pies yesterday (we made beef pies, like a Cornish pasty--finely diced beef, grated potatoes and onions). Both my daughter and I make very good pie crusts--I have 50 years of experience--but we are often frustrated at the inconsistencies and the problem of just the right moisture to flour ratio to have dough that rolls out easily, is thick enough to work with and make nice fluted edges, and is both tender and flaky.

We followed this recipe and were thrilled with the results. Our "test kitchen" experiments in the process might be useful for responding to a couple of the comments here. 1.) Use very cold, unsalted butter as in the recipe. If you use salted butter for a pie crust, plus the recommended salt (or even reduced amounts or no salt) it will be too salty tasting for many people. 2.) We tried the full amount of sugar and also reducing the sugar. Even for a savory pie, we liked the full amount of sugar best. 3.) We used the full amount of water/vodka and also reduced amounts, to experiment. Yes, it looks sticky with the full amount, but remember that some of that moisture will go away in baking (that is the function of the alcohol.), so the extra is needed to have a moist,flaky crust, not a less moist, crumbling one. The extra moisture also allows for the use of extra flour in rolling, which is very handy. 4.) Chill this dough for several hours and work fast with it. The high fat content dough benefits from being very firm when you're starting to work. Otherwise you'll have a very soft dough that rolls out nicely but is difficult to pick up and place on the pie tin. (That is one advantage of a pastry cloth. You can pick the whole thing up and put it in the fridge for a moment to chill and firm, then go back to work on it.) This dough can be re-rolled easily without toughening, but still, work lightly. Use plenty of flour to keep it workable--we found it didn't dry the dough out or toughen it, as can happen with regular crusts. (The alcohol again) 5. This recipe gave us plenty of dough for easy rolling to the right size and with more than enough for a pretty fluted edge--no need for patching and no skimpy edges that need foil protection to keep them from browning too much. We chilled them about an hour before baking so the edges would keep their shape.

Taste test: All the pies were wonderful but the one made exactly according to the recipe--exactly--was voted the best by the taste-testers who didn't know how we had made them. Not much difference in any of them, but still, the exact recipe--full amount of liquid and sugar--was considered the most flaky, tender and flavorful. As a side note: Using a food processor made this very, very easy (We also followed the number of pulses as given in the recipe). But, it can be made without a processor if the same cutting and distributing motion is used to combine flour and fat. Baking at 325 degrees for about 1 1/2 hours cooked the meat and potato filling perfectly and produced a uniformly beautiful, golden brown and delicious tasting crust.

Try this recipe for your next pie and make it exactly according to the recipe, without fear. You can do it differently the next time if you want, but the first time, trust the recipe--developed by people with tremendous knowledge and skill and with a scientific not gimmicky reason for their suggestions--and I think you'll be very happy with the results.

From Talk

How important is a gas range top vs. electric?

I find the comment about the resale value well-meaning. It's really not worth arguing this issue further.

From Talk

How important is a gas range top vs. electric?

I find the comment about resale value odd. I actually passed on purchasing a home a couple weeks ago in part because it had an electric range. The home is in an area with no natural gas, so I could run a LPG line to it easily enough, but for other, additional reasons, I decided to build instead. I will definitely be having an PG tank and line installed so I can have a gas range - I could never go back to electric. I plan to have a small wall built around it on 2 sides so it won't be visible from the street, and I'll plant flowering shrubs around that.

I don't understand why propane would be considered any riskier than NG. It is a much more stable fuel, and there is a limited amount of it on your property, whereas NG is piped in and once it ignites, there's an almost infinite supply to keep burning.

From Serious Eats

Store-Bought Chicken Stocks, Reviewed: Which Are the Best?

everyone see that "top chef" is using swanson stocks for most of teir challanges???

From Recipes

Cook's Illustrated's Foolproof Pie Dough

cjavel, that worked! Baking it per your instructions above resulted in a perfect golden brown crust. Thank you very much!

From Recipes

Cook's Illustrated's Foolproof Pie Dough

Thanks, cjavel. I'll try that. Another thing that probably affected my results was I did not chill the dough prior to baking. I think if it's at room temperature it probably turns darker much sooner, as well as not being as flaky as it could've been had I put in the oven cold.

From Talk

What are your favorite products from Trader Joe's?

Is the Pomegranate Glaze really discontinued? My mom tried to buy it in Atlanta but they didn't have it. Can it be found elsewhere???

From Talk

Paying for someone else's party?

I think tacky hardly begin to describe what this charge to the guest could be called. It sounds like someone is trying to make a buck on this affair. I honestly believe the "guest of honor" should be told. I know if someone were giving a party for me and a friend or associate did this, I'd be so embarassed I wouldn't know what to do. Then I'd get mad! I think this person would want to know. What's going to happen is that people eventually are going to hold resentment against the person the party was held for, they're not going to to believe they didn't know about it. I wonder if the honoree finds out about this just how STUPID the hosts are going to feel? I really hope someone tells them off about this, I also hope they have VERY few people show up. Of course they'll wonder why, they appear to be a very dense type.

From Talk

Paying for someone else's party?

We know a couple who regularly order pay-per-view events (mixed martial arts primarily) and then invite people over to watch. When you get there, they have a jar out for "donations" toward the refreshments and the cost of the pay-per-view. I find this so tacky, I refuse to go with my boyfriend. I agree with others -- if you can't afford to host a party, make it pot luck, or don't host a party.

From Talk

Paying for someone else's party?

I've got one for you, I was invited to a wedding and dinner afterward. The next line was if you want to bring a date he/she is not invited to dinner but feel free to invite them for dancing after dinner...Now how do you tell a date
meet me at the reception around 10pm., and be sure to dress up!..I did not attend.

From Talk

Paying for someone else's party?

Definitely should have been hosted as a potluck and BYOB. This is the second time that I've heard of this happening and both times that I've thought it was tacky.

The principal at my mom's work hosted a retirement party for a co-worker and it was a potluck, BYOB (no alcoholic beverages allowed) & a charge of $10.00 per person. If you did not bring anything it would be a $20.00 per person charge. This woman lives by me and we live in an area where homes start at around a million dollars... PLEASE!!!! How cheap can you be?! And as a side note: No entrance to the home was allowed - porta potties were brought in for the event...

From Talk

Paying for someone else's party?

I think the party ought to be a get together where everyone can bring a dish and maybe some booze. It's very inconsiderate to think that everyone can afford this sort of thing. If the people, who you don't know anyway, want to have a party, I think they should foot the bill.

From Talk

Paying for someone else's party?

Simply stated - gross - classless. nothing more to be said. surrah

From Talk

Paying for someone else's party?

I think this is better than getting invited by the birthday person him/herself to celebrate their own birthday at a restaurant and then be expected to share the cost of his or her meal at the end. That's VERY tacky.

I have contributed substantially to a big birthday bash once beforehand because I knew the person organizing it was going way beyond her means to do it. I got a call from a common friend suggesting contributions from close friends. I thought it was fair. And then you get a nice Thank You from the birthday person. That's your birthday gift, and that's it.

From Talk

Paying for someone else's party?

Last year, I threw a huge and quite expensive party for my partner's 60th birthday. About 60 people from in town and out of town came and enjoyed a sit-down soup-to-nuts formal catered dinner under an enormous tent in our garden. I provided full bar service and a trio of musicians to entertain our guests. The invitations specified no gifts, although a few people brought flowers or a bottle of wine. It would never have occurred to me to ask anyone to help pay for the party; it was my gift to my beloved partner. All of our guests had a marvelous time.

Soon thereafter, my partner and I received an invitation to a large (more than 100 guests) out of town birthday party for one of our friends who had attended my partner's party. The situation was the same as the situation the OP posted: pay XX amount per person, contribute to an expensive group gift to the birthday boy, etc.

I was astonished and emailed the person who invited us about our thoughts. The email was gentle and understated, merely asking a question or two about the situation. The party planner was astonished that paying for our friend's party might have been a problem for us: going to the party would have entailed boarding our animals, paying for travel expenses, plus paying the rather hefty 'charges' for actually being at the party. The party was to be a surprise for the birthday boy and, as in the original poster's situation, I believe that he had no idea his 'guests' were required to pay for the privilege of attending.

We elected to miss the event. No matter how much we love our friend (and we do), being asked to pay to attend his birthday party was, as so many posters have said, tacky and in exceptionally bad taste.

From Talk

Paying for someone else's party?

Many years ago I was invited to a birthday party that included a five dollar fee for the cost of the party. I was absolutely appalled. A host should carry the expense. People who were invited hummed and buzzed about the fee for weeks. Everyone wanted to celebrate the birthday, but everyone was insulted by the money issue. It was brought up to the hosts, all of whom kept pointing fingers at each other saying it way that person's idea, obviously embarrassed at what they had done. If it does not feel right, don't do it, is my motto. Clearly not theirs.

I have paid when invited to retirement parties, the price of a meal and the gift included in the cost. This practice seems natural and correct because no one person or couple is hosting the party. Rather it presents an opportunity for co-workers to celebrate the career of a colleague.

But individual parties, where hosts ask the guests to pay money are much more than tacky; they are degrading.

From Talk

Paying for someone else's party?

@janaatwg you did nothing wrong. Miss Manners says showers are the ONLY party where you are actually expected to bring a gift since the main purpose of the party is to shower the bride or mother to be with gifts.

I do find the pay to come birthday party kind of tacky. What if the birthday person's best friend is out of work and can't afford the $20/person?

From Talk

Paying for someone else's party?

Sorry, that should read "contribution is EXPECTED"...

From Talk

Paying for someone else's party?

I believe that asking people to contribute more than their own bottle of wine is okay if (a) it is not a party specifically hosted by someone for someone or themselves, but rather a surprise or get-together co-planned by a group (b) everyone knows what contribution is accepted BEFORE they're asked to make up their minds about attending. We have, for instance, a private dining club where everyone pays a fixed amount to the host for the evening, and it was made clear to all who joined before they did so that this applied. If a person would like a get-together at, say, a restaurant with friends on her birthday but can't afford to pay for those she invites, I'd suggest she invites them while making clear that everyone pays their own way - but just call it an evening out, rather than a birthday celebration. Attendees should not feel pressured to bring gifts.

From Talk

Paying for someone else's party?

I think a potluck 40th party would have been more interesting and more appropriate. On the invitation - please RSVP and let me know what you are bringing. Or is this tacky too? Otherwise if you cannot afford the party - don't give it.

From Talk

Paying for someone else's party?

Asking guests to pay for their attendance at a party is in very bad taste (unless its a charity/fund raising event, of course!). If guests want to bring a dish, or a bottle of wine, that's great. It should never be expected. When I "invite" people to my home - or anywhere else - its on my bill, not theirs. Never ever. Save your money and buy the inviters a book on manners.

From Talk

Paying for someone else's party?

You do not have to go if you find $20 per person to be a problem. They way I see it this person is doing everyone else a huge favor by taking all the planning on to their own shoulders. All you have to do is send $20 bucks, and you are free from figuring out how to contribute. Perhaps you are being the cheap one?

From Talk

Paying for someone else's party?

I don't find it unforgivable. You either pay or don't go.
Were you to take the person out yourself (as a couple), 3 people would cost you well over $40 for a nice meal. ($40 for 3 people wouldn't come close to a nice meal here in NYC.)
In this economy I guess I'd rather be asked to share the cost than not have celebrations at all. $20 a head? Is this really what you're complaining about?

From Talk

Paying for someone else's party?

I vote totalIy weird. I would make sure the host gets a copy of this so they don't make the same mistake again.

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About pielady

Website:

Location: WA state

About: Retired teacher. Love to cook and bake. Owned a coffee house and bistro for a couple years.

Favorite foods: Winter comfort food like hearty beef stew
Sautes with pan sauce

Last bite on earth: Apple or huckleberry pie