Serious Eats - seriouseats.com

I'd recommend my granola too:
http://alteredplates.blogspot.com/2008/10/spicy-nutty-seedy-agave-sweetened.html

> If someone's plate arrives late and the person says, "please start before
> your food gets cold," is it then appropriate to start, or should you still wait?

Wait. "Thank you, I'll wait for yours."

Whether at home or out, eating begins when the hostess picks up her fork. If all men are dining, or a woman is not playing the role of hostess, the host indicates beginning to eat.

It is the responsibility of a restaurant to serve everyone at table together, regardless of differences in preparation time. The expectation is that service happens at the same time, not start-of-cooking. Therein lies a core difference between a cook and a chef.

As for GolfGirl's difficult family members, gentle off-line introduction to etiquette, perhaps with references to Amy Vanderbilt or Emily Post might help. If they aren't sufficiently open-minded, then part of good manners is avoiding a scene in which case please eat to avoid the tears and certainly to avoid people popping up and down like Jacks-in-the-box to microwave things.

regards, dave