Profile

joe.distort

hot sauce. kitten s and puppies. records and comics. nerd.

  • Location: PHX
  • Favorite foods: tacos, iced tea, bourbon, cooked birds, stone fruits, smoked cheeses, any combination of hot sauce, peppers and onions
  • Last bite on earth: torta fresh off the press with a side of pizza and wings, washed down with a 32 oz bourbon mule

A Brief Guide to the Wonderful World of Entenmann's Doughnuts

those powdered Softees used to turn to an almost cracker-paste level moisture sponge when i would eat them as a child. i HAD to drink milk or i could barely swallow them .

the Coffee Cake (i think?) was a sunday treat for us. it (or McDonalds Big Breakfast) was usually a sign that Dad got home like, right before we woke up

Giveaway: Win a Sunday Funday Kit from Mrs. T's Pierogies

those nacho pierogies have been a thing in our house for a while...

Staff Picks: What to Drink at a Not-Great Bar

i dont go to bars much anymore, but a shot of turkey 101 and a bottle of highlife is a pretty safe bet anywhere

Cook the Book: Lonely Planet's 'The World's Best Spicy Food'

i brought home a bottle of Crescent City Capsicum from New Orleans and, after tasting it in the store and deciding it was a perfect level of heat, dumped a bunch on a pork slider. more came out of the nozzle than i expected, but i figured i could handle it

oh my word...this isnt the hottest sauce ever but it soaked into the bread and then coated my mouth and i could feel my heart beat in my eyes.

Open Thread: What's the Best Frozen Pizza?

Freschetta Spinach and Mushroom!

i used to abhor all frozen pizza (while sober anyway) but my wife got me on to this one.

Poll: Do You Take Photos of Burgers?

i write for a decently sized blog here in phx, and when i do a sandwich story i pretty much HAVE to take a picture...and i feel like such a weiner, every time.

Last-Minute Game Day Entertaining Ideas

great article, was just thinking how i wouldn't be able to enjoy it unless the first comment was correcting something no one cared about

seriously, why do people do this

Super Bowl Party Giveaway: Pat LaFrieda Sliders

watching a dvd of the Giants ruining the patriots undefeated season, cursing that i never win any of these Serious Eats contests :0

Super Bowl Party Giveaway: 17th Street BBQ Baby Back Ribs and Pulled Pork

well this week, i tried to be nice and help clean up after a large party of us stormed a local bbq joint since they were super nice...and i ended up spilling a ton of sauce, bones and beans all over me. and then walked around like that until i could get home to change.

bbq.

What's the Weirdest Ice Cream Flavor You've Ever Tried?

@eilonwy
when i saw your answer i assumed you were from az...lobster is mine too. At Pink Spot? love that place. the pizza next door however is a no-go. :)

Searching for crispy chicken sandwiches

well, i should say the best 'chain' one. theres multiple good places near me, but im nowhere near NYC. most of the time the good ones are at sports bars, check those near you

Searching for crispy chicken sandwiches

the best one used to be the Dennys buffalo sando; fried breast, sweet 'wing sauce' (i'm sure someone thought it was hot, but it really wasnt), red onion, garlic mayo (i think?) on ciabatta

sadly, i tried to get one a few months ago, made people meet me at a Dennys, and then it wasnt even on the menu anymore :(

Quick Drinks: Tart Cherry Cocktail

im all about the Trader Joes 100% cherry juice/lime/ ginger ale. even without booze its fantastic

Seriously Delicious Holiday Giveaway: High Road Ice Cream 6-Pack

bourbon chocolate swirl with pretzel bits

Seriously Delicious Holiday Giveaway: The Baking Steel

hot/sweet peppers

Seriously Delicious Holiday Giveaway: La Quercia's Secret Weapons Pork Kit

Seriously Delicious Holiday Giveaway: High Road Ice Cream 6-Pack

bourbon chocolate swirl

or

coconut water arnold palmer

The Best of the Big Easy: 14 Great Bites in New Orleans

after visiting New Orleans in the summer, i am in love with it. Cochon and Coops were probably the two best meals i had all year, on the complete opposite ends of the spectrum. Sleek/modern vs dive bar and i still dont know if i could pick which one was better.

cant wait to go back and venture to some of these spots

Burger City Guides: Paul McCabe's Favorite Burgers in Phoenix

we recently went to the Grind and were super disappointed in the burgers as well. everything else was great and the staff was awesome though

and i can see Lennys from my office window :)

A Hamburger Tuesday: Submit Your Turkey Burgers!

2 parts turkey
1 part ground italian sausage
.5 part sliced shishito peppers
mix in seasoning/ panko as desired

YOWZA

What You Need to Know About the Communion Wafer-Topped Ghost Burger at Kuma's Corner

'Perhaps getting lost in all of this is that a heavy metal band from Sweden is getting way more press than it ever imagined possible. '

this band already gets tons of press, i doubt this one story is changing *that* much of it

What You Need to Know About the Communion Wafer-Topped Ghost Burger at Kuma's Corner

knowing how GHOST is, they probably started the controversy themselves

good band and all, but SUPER gimmick/hype

also of possible note: since the singer comes out in full anti-pope gear, the communion wafer has a little more behind its story than 'this burger is named after a swedish metal band'

the funny part is this band sounds like 60s rock more than any extreme/death/black metal. people need to get over themselves

Ramen Hacks: 9 More Ways To Upgrade Your Instant Noodles

can we pleeeease retire all this ramen nonsense after this 'ramen week'

its really getting old and honestly makes me check the site less

Serious Entertaining: A Real Deal Barbecue Feast

so you are taking the 10 through then? i humbly suggest getting off in central phoenix on 16th street and sampling La Condesa, Barrio Cafe or one of the many torta shops. you wont find this stuff back east

Favorite Brewery in Your State

everyone in phoenix loves 4 Peaks, they have a wide variety.

my two favorite local beers both come from Papago Brewing though, a milk stout and a coconut coffee stout. delicious when paired with a rich chocolatey type snack

MODERNIST CUISINE- worth the hype/money?

my wife is a pastry chef and still in school for some related stuff, i would say her overall cooking level is like a 60/100* in regards to complexity and what she actually uses in day to day life. she is convinced she needs a copy of Modernist Cuisine, which as you guys know is like $450. for those in the know, is this book actually that useful outside of food science/working in a commercial molecular gastronomy setting/etc?

how much use do you really get out of it? $450 is a lot of money, and i would gladly spend a more reasonable amount for something comparable (ie: the 'at home' version, which is still pretty pricey, but $100 is much more reasonable). Thanks!

*arbitrary number rating system i just came up with...

Mission Bay-area San Diego secrets

Taking the wife to Mission Bay for a few days and we love random little places-especially of the taco/torta variety. any hidden gems you guys have to pass on? having a hard time searching on my own. we are open to most stuff, as long as its not insane prices or wait-times

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