Serious Eats - seriouseats.com

At Bill's Burger, the Fat Cat was a wonderful thing, due in part to the carmelized onions. However, its still the meat that shone through brightest, and for that, Bill's Burger is less deserving of any accolades than those mad meat scientists downtown. Asside from those carmelized onions, my burger sported a seasame bun (I custom ordered this but maybe I should try it as is with the english muffin next time) and American cheese. Clearly, this isn't the most brilliant example of a LaFrieda burger. I'm not saying simple is bad. All I'm saying is, true praise is deserved only when you take a fundamentally great ingredient and make it greater through your own ingenuity. And that is why Shake Shack wins. Meyer's Shack sauce is a maddening addition to the meat that mystifies and excites (Direct quote from the gf trying her first Shack burger: "Yo, why is this so good?! Like seriously... why!?"). Bill's is a little more straighforward. Also, I prefer the way Shack griddles the patties, not smashing them as severely as they do at Bill's, where a juicy medium rare is unattainable because the meat is pressed so thin. The upshot is, I'm nitpicking, and really, I loved Bill's burger. But unlike you, Ed, choosing between Shack and Bill is not like choosing between two of my equally loved children. It's like choosing between two of my children, one of whom is uglier and less intelligent. (I'm jk, I don't have children and I wouldn't, at least I don't think I would, love an uglier child less)