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Cut him loose. In my experience, ( I have a very low tolerance for picky eaters) its usually not the food, its a passive aggressive manuever to control something else. And sorry, didn't anyone teach this guy that its bad manners to pick things out of your plate at the table? Either he doesn't seem to know how this makes you feel, or he does and it doesn't matter. Throw that fish back!

As Liz Lemon would say, "That's a dealbreaker!" My partner does't like eggplant, mushrooms, zucchini and peas--and trust me, it sucks sometimes. Not enough to be a dealbreaker, because at least she's not a five year old about it--she'll eat around it, or give me her mushrooms or whatever. Only time it sucks is when we go out to eat because we generally share our entrees, but that's about it.

I couldn't imagine being with someone who doesn't like half the stuff that I like. Screw that.

You don't like mushrooms? Great. . .I'll gladly eat them. The king of the house also doesn't like cheesecake, corned beef, ribs, mayonnaise or Miracle Whip, sweet potatoes, macaroni and cheese, pumpkin pie (aka "baby-poop pie"), and the only thing he eats that's green is the lettuce on a Taco Bell taco.

He loves salmon patties, which I don't understand at all. Why would you want to poach a beautifully expensive fillet, mix it with an egg and cheap saltines and fry it in butter? But if that's what he wants for his birthday dinner, that's what he gets. When I grill, roast or pan fry any kind of beef, his serving is cooked an extra 10 or 20 minutes until it's dead and dry. I hate that.

There's a lot of food in the world, though, and we agree on a lot of them: biscuits and gravy, lasagna, pizza, Szechuan chicken, chili, anything Mexican, any form of rice, bouef bourguignon (I get all the mushrooms). He's perfectly happy to have frozen On-Cor Salisbury steaks while the rest of us have ribs; except for the cheesecake and pumpkin pie, he loves everything I bake; and he adores any variation of grilled cheese.

Fifty percent of the sons are normal, but there's the one who's almost 40 and hasn't eaten mashed potatoes since he was three; the one who scrapes the cheese off his lasagna (you should hear what his wife has to say about his food preferences); the one who won't eat cooked carrots. . .I love them all anyway.

And, my oh my, how I love that man o' mine. Madly. There's a lot more to nourishing a relationship than ringing a dinner bell; if he manages to feed your soul, keep him.

Sorry but it would be a deal breaker for me. Food (for me anyway) is an expression of love, passion, and joy. Move on.

you love cooking; i will dare to say that he hates eating. For him, it's an activity full of anxiety, barriers and neuroses.

You have an open mind about food; he's stubborn and narrow. I don't know what other dimensions you two click on, but food is something you eat every day. this one conflict may presage other problems.

And food is love. my girlfriend doesn't particularly like mushy food or sour cream, but if i cook something for her, mushy or not, she will eat it. It should be that way. Love should trump fear. especially if that fear is of mustard.

There are millions of guys out there. don't settle for somebody who will turn up their nose at your expressions of care and nurturing.

My husband was born and raised in the midwest on a steady diet of meat, potatoes and overcooked vegetables. He thinks he turned out OK, but I am forced to point out that something went terribly wrong because he eats raw seafood regularly. It is one of the things I like best about him.

That said, my impatience with pickiness is my problem. I struggle daily to overcome it, but I'm not sure if I could overcome it in a partner. A lot of what we share is the joy of discovering a new hole in the wall, a high end meal, purchasing a dol sot and so on.

With you on this one AliceBlue. Mine has a (relatively short) list of things he can't eat - and each comes accompanied by a horror story of childhood food massacres. I have cooked each thing for him since and he keeps trying to get over it with delicious versions of the listed items to no avail. But he juts LOVES everything else I cook and brags about me to his friends.
If he defined himself by what he doesn't eat (and I know people who do - unbearable) then I would have found it difficult to enjoy my life with him. Instead I don't even think about it any more as there are so many other foods out there and we have a great time with food (I cook it, he eats it, he does the dishes). I also have a friend who has serious food allergies but loves food and comes over regularly for friendly feasts.
So really it is about how it fits with the rest of your lives together and it seems that his proclivities are a limitation rather than a challenge...sad, but I couldn't live like that :p

I use to dissect my pizza pops. With toothpicks. I'd carefully make incisions all on one side, then peel that layer/top off and eat it. Eat the insides. Then devour the rest.

I also eat my PB&B sandwiches a certain way. It's almost ritualistic how I prepare them too...Top-crust, side to side, then around the bottom eating the rest of the crust and eating the by then gooey-middle.

When ever I eat cashews, peanuts, etc...I pick through and eat all the seperated/broken bits. Then take the bag, shake it up, and pick through again. I'll eat the 'whole' ones last.

I actually have a friend who married a guy with weird food issues. She LOVES food. He has an odd set of food criteria that make it challenging for us when we have them over and for himself, but he does not force his food issues on anyone. She has different issues of her own. After all, no one is perfect. WE ALL HAVE OUR ISSUES.
They've been married 10 years, have a gorgeous and hilariously independent four year old daughter, a beautiful home, loving family and friends, they are both accomplished, gorgeous, and truly wonderful people. If they had a Golden Retriever, they'd be pushed into a Stepford version of the perfect family. The reality is that during the course of the 10 years, the food issue was the least of the problems they overcame. Their problems are pretty universal to all marriages--worries over money, worries over job security, where to live (he was working for NASA, she was working for Capital One, both workplaces were in different cities), buying a house, selling a house, buying another house, worried that the other house isn't selling, moving, the economy, why can't he scrub the toilet for a change, not enough sex, too much sex, let's renovate omigod why'd we renovate, etc.
What I'm trying to say is that a relationship is more than what he won't eat. It is what WILL he eat? How will WE handle issues, big and small? If you're ready to throw in the towel, then be honest. But if he's a keeper in every other way--you know he'll be there in a crisis, he's honest, he's motivated, he makes your heart skip, he makes you laugh, you make him laugh. Oh! FLASH of inspiration! Do you read The Pioneer Woman?! If you don't, you must. Her husband is Meat and Potatoes. She is sushi and starbucks (well, not together). The thing is, she says he makes her hiney tingle or her skirt fly up or her ovaries leap or something like that (she's pretty funny). She's a food blogger--food's important to her, but she fell in love with a man who want's steak and baked potato and a wedge of iceberg with ranch dressing (I think that's right). AND they made it work!

Black beans & yellow rice w/ tostones or boiled yucca...

Salmon nigiri with ginger and wasabi. Give it to me baby. I can't get enough!

Blah blah blah..

DMFA.

ps- one of my best friends is a canadian named sunshine. Weird.

pizza - one of the best foods in the whole world... straight cheese pizza with a great doughy crust always does it for me.