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Michael Dietsch

Michael Dietsch

Barfly, boozologist, and technographer. Lives with spirited female, ever-expanding son, and crazy felines in Brooklyn.

Your Spirit Guides to the Incorporeal Realms of Magick and Macking

  • Website
  • Location: Brooklyn
  • Favorite foods: Bourbon, rye, gin
  • Last bite on earth: Negroni

Should Cocktails Get Simple Again?

While some cocktail bars focus on ever-more unusual techniques and ingredients, there are bartenders and patrons alike who are beginning to push back. While some cocktail programs focus on the elaborate, we're beginning to see an opposite trend emerging: simplicity. More

Leo Robitschek On Getting Prepped for the Manhattan Cocktail Classic

The Manhattan Cocktail Classic kicks off tonight with the Gala at the New York Public Library on Fifth Avenue. Organizers expect to serve something like 22,000 cocktails tonight; prepping that many drinks takes some planning and hard work. I talked to Leo Robitschek, bar manager at NoMad and Eleven Madison Park, about the process of preparing and batching up cocktails for such a large gathering. More

25 Cocktails Everyone Should Know

We who like to mix drinks at home do it for many reasons: First, it's cheaper than drinking out. Second, it's fun to mix your own drinks at home. Third, it's even more fun to mix drinks for other people at home. Any self-respecting home bartender should have a mental Rolodex Excel spreadsheet of favorite classic cocktail recipes. Today, I present the 25 essential drinks that I think everyone should be able to make. More

Cocktail 101: How to Make a Martini

How many ways are there to enjoy a martini? Over at Slate, Troy Patterson has given a lot of thought to this question. He staged a Tournament of Martinis, in the pattern of the NCAA basketball tourney. Starting with 80 recipes (yes, 80), he paired drinks up and let them battle for supremacy. He includes martini variations that I don't think of as such: for example, martinis with Chartreuse, Scotch, elderflower liqueur, or lime juice. Patterson's path is fun to read, but I have no intention of duplicating his work. Instead I want to focus on just a few elements of the martini: the ingredients, the ratio, the preparation, and the presentation, along with a little history. More

Cocktail 101: Savory Cocktails in Theory and Practice

Forget the tomato juice. Put down the celery salt. If you can look past the Bloody Mary, you'll find a whole world of savory cocktails waiting for your enjoyment. Savory cocktails can be built using savory ingredients, such as vegetables and salt, or they can be made from savory spirits, such as aquavit, gin, and sherry. Smoky spirits, such as mezcal and certain Scotches, can also add a savory side to a drink. More

Cocktail 101: How to Cut Citrus Wedges

All you'll need for this simple cocktail garnish is a sharp knife, a cutting board, and well-washed citrus. A sharp knife is especially important here because a dull knife will squeeze the fruit into a misshapen lump, which will make your wedges look weird. No one likes weird wedges. More

Cocktail 101: A Guide to Garnishes

Usually a bright piece of fruit, or a briny olive, or a festive umbrella, but sometimes something much more fancy, the cocktail garnish has a solid place in the history of cocktails. Today, we'll look at what garnishes are and how to get started using them to good effect. More

The Serious Eats Guide to Cognac

Cognac. To many, it's the ultimate in brandy. Now, you may ask why? Does it taste better? is it the expense? The time to make it? The grapes? The history? I'd say it's all of those things, and more. But what is cognac? How's it made, and what makes it special? More

The Serious Eats Guide to Brandy

When I mention brandy, you probably have an image already in your head. An older gentleman, sitting quietly in a leather armchair, perhaps smoking a pipe while listening to Brahms, swirling a snifter of brandy around in his hand. We think of brandy as an Old World after-dinner drink. And I have to say, it serves that purpose beautifully. But if you limit it to that, you're missing out on a lot. More

Cocktail 101: Five Essential Campari Cocktails

If you've never had Campari, the bright red liquid masks a surprise. This bittersweet stuff is definitely an acquired taste. I suspect nearly everyone grimaces the first time they try it, but that's no reason to give up. Campari cocktails are richly rewarding once you come around. Because they're long on flavor, you can generally savor them, letting them linger in your glass and on your mind. Here are five essential ways to enjoy this red elixir. More

Cocktail 101: Stocking Up For a Storm

This may seem like a frivolous question, especially while we're all still digging out from this mess, but as Sandy demonstrated, a massive storm brings two problems: there's not just the problem of what do you do if the power goes out, but there's also the issue of what you do while you're waiting. More

The Way We Drank: Cocktail Trends of 2012

It's time to look back at the year that was, and the way we drank. In 2012 we noticed three prominent trends relating to cocktail preparation and service: carbonated cocktails, bottled cocktails, and cocktails on tap. Other trends focused on new ingredients: savory additions inspired by the kitchen, cocktail ingredients aged individual in barrels, and new domestic liqueurs, digestifs, and aromatized wines. We've also seen a movement toward making drinks more fun, with throwback cocktails and the rise of soda-fountain inspired cocktails. More

9 More Great Sips from the Manhattan Cocktail Classic

I also spent some time with Privateer. Good people, good ethic, and most of all, great product.

25 Cocktails Everyone Should Know

@Jesse, I understand your point about highballs. My reason for cutting them was simple: Highballs could have easily taken up half the list or more. And since so many of them contain the full recipe right there in the title (Gin and Tonic, Scotch and Soda), I felt comfortable trimming them.

25 Cocktails Everyone Should Know

One more thing. Daiquiri and Mojito: Cuba. Planters Punch: Jamaica. Let's throw over the Jamaican drink in favor of two from Cuba.

I mean, seriously. If you really want to knife me, knife me for the Boulevardier, not the Planter's Punch.

25 Cocktails Everyone Should Know

As for the COSMO. It was the only vodka drink on the list. One out of 25.

How many vodka drinks would other boozy sites have put on a list of 25? I suspect there would have been more than one.

And remember the point of this list. It's for drinks you should know how to make for people you care about. Remember? Third, it's even more fun to mix drinks for other people at home. I said that in the beginning.

Defensive? Hell yes, I'm defensive. I think it's important to make even a COSMO for people you care about who might want a COSMO. So, yes, the COSMO belongs here. I don't particularly like it, but it's better than most vodka drinks, so when I look for the one and only vodka drink worth mentioning, I go for the COSMO.

(Hint: The Moscow Mule is a highball. I'm not including highballs here.)

25 Cocktails Everyone Should Know

@CareyJones

What I really want right the hell now is a Planter's Punch made of Smith and Cross. I like the Planter's dark and rich, and I like my Daiquiris clean and bright. So for a Daiquiri, I like Banks Five Islands, or 10 Cane.

Anyone who thinks a drink made with Smith and Cross is interchangeable with a drink made from Banks or 10 Cane is... oh, never mind. I'm probably just defensive much.

Rum is rum, right?

25 Cocktails Everyone Should Know

The Planter's Punch is also a built drink served long. It's as dissimilar to a Daiquiri as the Mojito is. I swear, had I built this list around 25 repetitions of the Mojito, you'd all still be griping that there weren't enough Mojitos. Enough already.

Video: A Dog Makes Food For Someone He Loves in the Animated Short 'Omelette'

Eep. I might be a little wet around the eyeholes.

25 Cocktails Everyone Should Know

Wait, the Planter's Punch doesn't belong because it's a daiquiri variant, but the Mojito does? Let's see, sugar, lime juice, rum, mint, and soda. Sounds like a fizzy, minty daiquiri to me.

25 Cocktails Everyone Should Know

I at least implied it was optional. Very sorry to make you unhappy.

Cocktail 101: A Guide to Garnishes

Jonathan:

Nope, those are news to me, so I'll check them out.

We're back in Brooklyn now after our hiatus in Providence, so I'm around the city now. But of course I'm on baby duty most days, which limits my after-dark availability.

I am hoping to attend the Invitational and possibly some other MCC events. I'm waiting to hear about press credentials. I will not, though, be at Tales this year. Baby #2 is on the way, so unless a miracle or a lottery-win happens, we can't afford the travel.

Great to hear from you!

Cocktail 101: How to Cut Citrus Wedges

Congratulations, "Pav." I wrote 565 words on this "silly subject," and got paid for them. You wrote about 1,150 words (more than twice my word count), for free.

Cocktail 101: How to Cut Citrus Wedges

Sorry, I'm just getting back to the computer ...

@ryuthrowsstuff is right: the pole-to-pole cut is easier to work with, if you want a wedge that you can squeeze into a drink.

I should have mentioned that that's the purpose of a wedge. It's not ornamental; it's there to let the patron adjust the acidity of the drink, by adding juice, if desired. A wheel won't cut it for that purpose.

@MikeyyMikeyy is also correct. If you want to cut the same notch into all of your wedges, do it after halving the citrus. But if you want some wedges to stand upright and some to balance perpendicularly to the rim, then cut each individual wedge to spec.

Thanks for the comments, everyone.

Do liqueurs/cordials go bad?

Kevin is right; most liqueurs won't go bad. The flavors may degrade a bit over time, but all that means is that the liqueur will taste a little flatter and duller in 15 years than it does when it's first opened.

Cream-based liqueurs, your Baileys and that kind of thing, will go bad. The manufacturers usually list a shelf-life on the bottle, and at that point, if it starts smelling weird, feed it to your sink.

Crème liqueurs (crème de menthe, crème de cacao, etc.) are not cream based, by the way. Depending on who you talk to, "crème" either means "cream of the crop" (that is, here's the finest mint liqueur on the market), or it refers to the cream-like texture of the liqueur. At any rate, they contain no actual cream, so they'll last long, like other liqueurs.

Cocktail 101: More Complex Shrub Syrups

@Joel: Good question, and I think you've answered it yourself. You would lose complexity, I believe, but if you're making a shrub with a delicate fruit, you might want a lighter vinegar, right?

The Serious Eats Guide to Brandy

Eat This Cheese: St. Marcellin

The crock is fun to keep, too. I have one in the fridge with bacon grease in it.

The Serious Eats Guide to Single Malt Scotch

Wow, the formatting kind of kills me here. I said in the original post that a single-GRAIN scotch whisky varies only in that it contains barley and one or more other cereal grains.

I have no idea why the UK legally defined single-grain whisky as the product of one or more grains from a single distiller. The idea of single-grain would imply that it's one single grain, not multiple grains from one single distiller.

But that's the law. A single grain Scotch whisky is a whisky made from one or more grains, made at a single distillery somewhere in Scotland.

The Serious Eats Guide to Single Malt Scotch

That's not what I said. You're quoting me out of context. I said:

A single-grain scotch whisky [emphasis added; I did NOT say single malt] varies only in that it contains barley and one or more other cereal grains, usually wheat or corn. Again, single is misleading here: it refers not to a product made from a single grain, but a product made at a single distillery.

The laws about Scotch are maddening. As I also said, "The root of all confusion lies in the simple word single."

Single means only that the product comes from a single distillery.

Malt means malted barley.

Single malt means the malted barley from one specific distillery.

Grain whisky means a whisky made from barley and one or more other cereal grains, usually wheat or corn.

Single grain whisky means a grain whisky, as defined above, that comes from one distillery.

So. What I originally said was "A single-grain scotch whisky varies only in that it contains barley and one or more other cereal grains." I did NOT say that a single malt scotch contains other grains. What I did say was that a single grain whisky is a grain whisky from a single distiller.

Cocktail 101: Bourbon and Rye Drinks from a Low-Stocked Bar

My comments were meant to explain what I don't like about this column and to suggest ideas that would make me more interested in it. That seems like a valid topic to me.

So, a topic for a post is what Sethmad doesn't like about this column. To be generous, maybe a topic for a second post is what ideas would make Sethmad more interested in this column.

adashofbitters@gmail.com

Submit your ideas.

Cocktail 101: Bourbon and Rye Drinks from a Low-Stocked Bar

When I started this little series two weeks ago, I wrote in the very first paragraph...

You go to mix a drink and you realize you're running low on just about everything. So what do you do? Or maybe you're starting out fresh, and you want to know which bottles will help you build the most versatile bar.

So what makes you think that "this column is supposed to be about how to mix from a low-stocked bar, not about how to build up your low-stocked bar..."?

I said from the beginning that I had a dual purpose for this series of posts. That's what I promised, and that's what I intended to do. If it's the case that you're not interested in what I'm doing, that's certainly your prerogative, but please don't try to suggest that this column isn't about building a up a low-stocked bar. I said at the outset that that was one of my goals.

Frankly, I think Benedictine offers much more value for the money than a six-buck triple sec or a ten-buck brandy. It's clear you disagree, but it's also clear that this is a value judgement, on which neither of us are "right" by any objective standard, and so I'm puzzled that you continue to read this column while thinking so little of my opinion.

There is a lot of merit in the idea of a post about using bottom-shelf spirits in ways that mask some of their flaws in order to make a good drink, but if you expect me to tailor Cocktail 101 entirely around the idea of low-cost drinking, I promise to disappoint you.

Will Gordon covers that beat much, much better than I could, and there's no need for me to duplicate his work.

Cocktail 101: Bourbon and Rye Drinks from a Low-Stocked Bar

So what you're asking is that I tailor this column entirely to your needs? Got it. Sethmad 101.

Cocktail 101: Bourbon and Rye Drinks from a Low-Stocked Bar

@monopod: I'm in complete agreement on the Vieux Carre. But had I included it, the comments would say, "How can this be a low-stocked bar if it has Benedictine and cognac?!?! I CRY BULLSHIT. JIHAD!!!!!!!"

This, my friend, is the Kobayashi Maru.

Cocktail 101: Bourbon and Rye Drinks from a Low-Stocked Bar

The Benedictine in today's recipe is 1/2 ounce. A $30 bottle contains 750ml, or 25.4 ounces. That means this "expensive" bottle will supply enough juice for 50 cocktails. The Benedictine in the Frisco Sour comes to about 60 cents.

To me, that's value.

This is exactly how deeply stocked home bars are made, by the way. You find the ingredients that will work in a variety of different drinks, but in small quantities, and you build from there.

Do I think anyone's going out today and buying both Benedictine and Chartreuse? Of course not. But if you buy one today and the other in a few weeks or months or whatever, you're slowly building a versatile bar.

The Serious Eats Guide to Single Malt Scotch

@Bigbananafeet: No worries. It sounds like a good show, and I have Netflix, so I'll check it out.

The Serious Eats Guide to Single Malt Scotch

@Bigbananafeet: Until I looked it up, I thought "The Hour" is one of those morning talk shows aimed at women, like "The View." The idea of a group of women sitting around a table chugging scotch on morning TV is appealing.

I suspect that very idea is a number-one-hit TV show in Japan.

Homebrewing Basics: All About Yeast

Yeast have the most important job in brewing: they start with sugar and break it down, leaving alcohol, carbon dioxide, and a variety of flavors. The importance of yeast often gets forgotten when conversations about beer turn to grain and hops, but yeast actually have the potential to contribute more unique flavors to your beer—both good and bad—than any other ingredient. Last week we talked about grain, and next week we'll look at hops, but today I'll be giving you what you need to know about yeast to make the best homebrew possible. More

The Physiology of Foie: Why Foie Gras is Not Unethical

Video or photographic footage of one badly managed farm or even a thousand badly managed farms does not prove that the production of foie gras, as a practice, is necessarily harmful to the health or mental well-being of a duck. Foie gras production should be judged not by the worst farms, but by the best, because those are the ones that I'm going to choose to buy my foie from if at all. More