This topic was inspired by my watching several episodes of Simply Ming in a row and seeing how his apparent refusal to do multiple takes (there's really no other explanation) has led him to say humorously boneheaded things on the air. At one point, he said something to the effect of "and now I cut the fish into two pieces" while clearly cutting it into three. In a short, bookend segment, he said on the subject of toasting croutons "now this should take one minute at most [quick cut] okay, it's been two minutes and these are ready." He actually caught himself and corrected after referring to orange syrup as carrot syrup.
I've also heard that in my parent's day there were various famous chefs who tended to go through a good bit of wine over the course of an episode and quite clearly not finish sober.
So, Serious Eaters, what chef quirks amuse you?