Has anyone ever had edible Chinese food within 50 miles of Portland, OR?

I absolutely love and appreciate delightful, authentic, non-Americanized stuff... but that's not what I'm looking for.

What I'm seeking is a place to get good old inexpensive American-Chinese sand-bys.

It seems like every place I try is worse than the previous. The final straw was a few years ago when the General-Tso's we ordered was (literally) baked(!) frozen chicken nuggets with a "sauce" that appeared to be a mixture of concentrated orange juice and high-fructose corn syrup.

I'm obviously not looking for a 17-star gourmet dining experience... I just want tasty, greasy, comfort food.

I am willing to go almost anywhere at this point; from Hillsboro to Gresham.

Please help!