Serious Eats - seriouseats.com

Bologna, Miracle Whip, Wonder bread....tastes like an elementary school cafeteria floor must taste. I shouldn't have typed that so early in the morning, I feel a little queasy now...

Count me in as a Miracle Whip hater. My mom loved it and refused to by mayo. She once tried to get me to eat a sardine, mustard, and Miracle Whip concoction on bread from the bakery surplus store that had then been frozen for about 6 months. Truly disgusting.

my mom somehow thought i would fall in love with cream cheese and sprouts sandwhiches in middle school. she tried twice. the second one ended up under the portable for the squirrels.

While in elementary school I was served peanut butter and jelly sandwiches at a friends. Cheese slices were a surprise third ingredient. Gag....

Its not exactly a sandwich, but my mom loved canned asparagus on toast with mayo warmed up and drizzled on top. I dont like mayo and only use it in very small doses and I hated asparagus for years untill I finally tried the fresh stuff.

loose meat sandwiches are pretty terrible, so are hotbrowns.

my mom grew sprouts and veggies in a hydroponic garden we had, and made her own pita bread.. i was the only 4th grader with a pomegranate and that sandwich for sure..

When I was visiting a few months ago my parents both started raving about my mother's egg salad. "You have to learn to make this egg salad!" my dad says. Okay, my mom is not a great cook over all but there are some things she does well. This was not one of them. The egg salad consisted of equal parts hard boiled eggs and Miracle Whip, nothing else, not even salt and pepper, served between 2 squishy pieces of potato bread. It was all I could do to finish half with a smile.

I am very grateful that she never attempted to give me shrinkwrapped cheese, oscar meyer lunch"meat", or wonderbread, though.

Tuna--anytime anywhere from a school lunch bag, with iceberg lettuce and a unripe unseeded tomato. I didn't mind Miracle Whip, but yes, it was made with that....pb and jelly on rye bread was another of my mother's specialties.

Plus apple--immediately tossed, and fun-size box of raisins--ditto.

Ice cream sandwiches when I could bum a quarter were my favorite defense on such days.

Last month, at the recommendation of Boston-area foodies, I sought out and attempted to eat a banh-mi with gristle. Actually I think it was Vietnamese Head Cheese, but to me, it was jellied gristle, and needed to be flossed out of my teeth. I tried to wash that nasty sandwich out of my mouth with a bite of the steamed pork bun my husband was enjoying (filled with PINK ground pork)--even more disgusting. I will NEVER attempt to eat a banh mi (or steamed pork buns) again--no matter what the purported filling.

My best friend when I was little loved braunschweiger with butter on white bread, so I had to suffer through a few of those. Put me off any kind of pate for many years.
Also, anything involving Miracle Whip qualifies in my book. That stuff is disgusting.

Liverwurst.

My friend in middle school was Philipine so maybe it was a cultural thing?? But she would have a sandwich made with white bread, mayo, and chocolate jimmys. Everyday I would watch her eat that sandwich completely creeped out.

@traveller I used to eat as a kid to white, buttered pieces of bread with cheese, plain style chips and butter pickles lol. I got to try that one again and see if I still have a taste for it.

@KarynMC- Bread and butter with sugar is a terrible meal, but it makes a yummy dessert! Oooh, especially on dinner rolls!

Ground bologna on white bread.

I can't believe how many of us were traumatized by sandwiches as children!!!! lol
Feedme, it's terrible, I thought I hated tuna sandwiches until I discoverd Hellmann's

@Karynmc - OMG - I can't stop laughing! That is totally my dad too!

I must stick up for bologna here! It's one of my favorite sandwich meats, as is liverwurst. I'm probably going to be in the minority here, but turkey breast is one of my least favorites, because it always ends up so dry and flavorless. I'll take almost any other sandwich protein before I choose turkey.

I generally love all sandwiches, especially Banh Mis, but I'm not particularly fond of tuna sandwiches from canned tuna or PBJs made with chunky peanut butter.

Bologna rules!

does anyone remember or know what TAYLOR HAM was?

well, i went to day camp for 2 weeks when i was about 10 years old... and they served us 1 slice of taylor ham between 2 pieces of dried white bread smeared with butter. i had never eaten butter on a sandwich in my life and was horrified. and freaking bug juice. ugh. i hated camp.

we were used to sandwiches from the local italian neighborhood joints:
sopressatta with roasted peppers on a crusty seeded bread. or some other exquisite italian combination. or sardine and red onion sandwiches on a seeded bread with a squirt of lemon. now that's a sang-wich!

@Traveller: Ha! When I vacationed in San Francisco each summer, I always layered Laura Scudder's (brand unavailable in HI) sour cream and onion potato chips (not crushed on purpose...ended up that way toward the end) and cheap french onion dip on fresh baked sour dough bread, and eat it in the hotel room as a snack while my mother was sleeping. That was awesome. I haven't had that concoction in 20 or so years...maybe I'll try it again some time soon if I could only find fresh baked sour dough bread - near impossible to find in Cleveland.

@feeedme: Miracle Whip is sweet / tangy, which, if you are expecting mayo when you see white spread, throws your flavor expectation off. It's quite an overwhelming flavor if you use it in a dish like potato salad. I think you can get it in a really, really tiny bottle. Check it out some time.

@pooch-- Taylor ham is DELICIOUS. I'm a veg, and I still dream about it. My mom used to broil it and stick it on a potato roll. Omg, yumm.

Worst sandwich ever occurred freshman year of college. The dining hall had few options for vegetarians. So, I had a lettuce and tomato and hot pepper sandwich on nasty, cardboard wheat bread for like 2 months.

Then, I started making my own stuff in my dorm room.

@chisai - I never tasted a tuna melt, but I find the very idea so unappetising that I know for sure I will never be tempted to.

I don't think I ever had a bad sandwich. I've never tasted Miracle Whip and I don't eat tinned tuna, and these two seem to be the worst offenders. It seems I've been very lucky!

the peanut butter and jelly sandwiches that were served in the school cafeteria when i was in grade school. washed down with warm milk from wax carton. i still have nightmares.

@cassendra- oh your back I missed you so much, everyone is wondering where you went.
@ producestories -I have to try it again, it has been eons since my last. But i do know one thing, liverwurst is still icky to me.

Muffalattos (can't even spell it right) - too many friggin olives! Oh and throw in the bagel - tongue - horseradish sandwich someone gave me one day. That one lasted about a micro second before it hit the trash!

@Ribster: Oh yeah, I have found that muffuletta are easy to screw up. I always ask for the green olive stuff on the side, just in case the concoction is really sweet. I've had it where it was really runny, too. Ugh.

@pjracz10: Thanks! :D

My husband introduced me to grilled tuna and fried bologna sandwiches. I had never had them before until a few years back, so it hasn't gotten old the few times I've had it. Smoked bologna is pretty good anyway you eat it anyway.

@Cassaendra: grilled tuna and fried bologna? That sounds delicious!

peanut butter, eggs, and dice

Can of tuna fish, 2 slices of american cheese, miracle whip and a bunch of salt on an english muffin open-faced.

My best friend's dad used to make these things whenever I came over to visit (well after I graduated college). He was so proud of them I just grinned and suffered through it hoping it would maybe taste difference this time. It never did.

Agggg! Ham Salad--the Waterloo of sandwiches! Just looks completely like vomit.

And what IS it with Miracle Whip? My mom used it too? I think there's paprika in there? And definitely sugar, because the one place I actually like it is when I make coleslaw dressing because I don't need to add any sugar.

Tuna fish salad + cheese + heat =Evil.

I saw my grandfather make the nastiest thing once: On a stale biscuit, layer cold baked beans, sliced hard-boiled egg and slices of raw onion. It has scarred me for life.

my mother made (and I often ate as a child) Peanut Butter, pickle relish and mayo (wasn't mayo.. it was Miracle Whip *yuk*) sandwiches.

I am still not a sandwhich fan, too many brown bags with stale bread and tasteless fillings in my childhood to enjoy them now.

My father has horrible taste in sandwiches, so I was exposed to many dubious sandwiches as a child. Some of his favorites are:

** almond butter and caper ("just like a peanut butter and pickle sandwich," as though that makes so much more sense)

** butter and yellow ballpark mustard

** chunky peanut butter, jam, yellow mustard, lettuce (or better, stale bagged salad mix), and cheese(optional). He thought it would be humorous to pack this in my lunch once in Middle School. Needless to say, he was not encouraged to help out with school lunches after that.

While I find the above sandwiches vile, I have apparently inherited some of his - er - creativity. My favorite sounds-gross, tastes delicious sandwich is peanut butter, mashed banana, and sharp cheddar cheese. Yum!

The worst sandwich is the one I have to eat in a rush...as a matter of fact, the worst "anything" I ever had is the one I have had to eat in a rush...

I got a few ''oh I'll make you a sandwich in no time '' comments...and got quite horrible mixes...
my brother's wiches consisted of : salami,mustard,orange cheese,chips (yes in the sandwich) and another layer of salami. (and I'm a vegetarian.) because apparently,to him, salami isn't meat (what is it then, a vegetable???)
my aunt's sandwiches (for my veg tastes) were: white bread, mayonnaise, lettuce and cottage cheese. talk about bland.

And while I got some ewws on this one, a grilled cheese dipped in maple syrup sounds awful but it's quite good really!

@KarynMC - OMG, my Canadian grandparents served me those sandwiches! Some days it was white sugar, some days brown, but always butter and white bread!

My mom and aunts had a love affair with packaged, sliced ham (Danola, I think). They would serve it on Wonder Bread - double ugh - with either mayo or Squeeze Parkay Margarine.

All the ingredients would stick to one another the moment you took a bite, and then, en masse, they would stick to the roof of your mouth, your teeth, etc. It was like wallpaper glue in a lunchbox. I am gagging at the mouth feel memory of those slimy, chewy creations.

Bologna, Kraft Singles and Miracle Whip on fat white bread. Blech!!

Also, I don't like butter on cold sandwiches, so... some kind of mystery pre-wrapped deli style meat like olive loaf with buttered bread. The horror....

Actually, most of those weird, funny smelling deli-style meats on anything are gross.

Most of mine deal with tuna. I think the official worst sandwich I ever had was a tuna salad hoagie from Wawa. I have no idea how people eat their tuna, but it is SO heavily mayonnaised it just oozes out of the sandwich. Blech. I can feel my arteries clogging just thinking about that day.
I also made the mistake once of packing a tuna salad sandwich (made at home with a normal tuna:mayo ratio) to eat several hours later at lunch. I don't think it would've been hazardous to my health to eat the sandwich, but it definitely felt like the salad had taken a turn for the worse over the course of that time. Apparently it wasn't kept cold enough.
One last one...my family had a constant war going as to how to make tuna salad. My mom and I agreed that it should be tuna, mayo, celery, and onions, my dad wanted his with relish (*shudder*). So one day at lunch, my mom offered me tuna salad, i bit in expecting my normal sandwich, and got my dad's sandwich instead. Horrible surprise.

The worst ever? White bread, glops of mayo, raw white onion, parsley. Someone made this for my husband and me right after we got married. She wouldn't tell me what was in it, just that it was a surprise and I would love it. I'm amazed that I was able to get it back out of my mouth without incident, and by incident I mean the almost instantaneous upchucking that usually occurs when I accidentally bite into raw onion. It was HIDEOUS! But at least she used Hellman's ;)

YES I am totally with the Miracle Whip Haters. I think I hate it because it has that slightly sweet flavor. If I wanted sweet, I'd have PB&J. I guess I always associate mayo with more savory flavors and the sweetness of Miracle Whip makes my taste buds confused and upset.

Bologna on white bread with ketchup. The ketchup made everything so soggy. When I was little, I loved eating it since it kind of tasted like a hot dog. Now the thought of it makes me ill...

i recall some incident with trying to make a sandwich with processed american cheese slices, mustard and i think... potato\ chips or something? i made this on one of the rare occasions i was babysat claiming "my mom lets me make this all the time" i know i ate too many cheese slices that night and then threw them up.
i kinda still make the same kind of food mistakes.

I dont understand what's so wrong with white bread and mayo?? No one likes a turkey or ham sandwhich with lettuce, cheese, mayo, mustard and tomatoe?? Weird. I guess I'm the odd man out. I also really like Tuna sandwiches on white bread-maybe because my dad never let us eat white bread growing up...
Anyways my worst sandwich ever growing up was a PB&J with butter on the jelly side!!! I gaged everytime I took a bite to find a layer of butter in there as well UGH! And I'd have to agree with the bologna on white w/mayo-NASTY!! What is bologna anyways?? Like animal parts all ground into one little round circle lol?