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Hot Jalepeno Hands

As we speak my hands are on fire! I have googled it, called my mom, tried remedies I thought would work, and nothing has helped. How on earth do I get the burning from the jalepeno off my hands? Here is a list of what I have tried so far...

soaking them in milk = very realiving but not a cure...and who can soak their hands in milk all night long?

washing with dish soap = does not realive it

washing with alcohol= does not help

washing with vinegar = does not help

covering hands in sour cream = helps a little but does not cure it

putting aloe vera gel on hands= makes it 100 x worse

trying to wait it out = nearly impossible because it feels like someone is setting my hands on fire or placing them in boiling water!

Any tips?

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