Serious Eats - seriouseats.com

hah that reminds me of an old family story, how my grandmother sent my grandfather out to the store for some lettuce and he came home with a head of cabbage :)

I seldom send my spouse to the grocery store, but sometimes -- not often, thankfully -- I need to ask him to pick something up. And every time, without fail, he returns triumphantly with the item I asked for AND an amazing story highlighting his bafflement at the entire world of uncooked food products.

One time it was flour. I just need plain flour, not rye, not whole wheat, not bread flour, not cake flour. But of course, all of those are labeled, but there's no flour labeled, "this is the plain flour that your wife asked you to buy." Another time he claimed that a little old lady thought he was trying to pick her up when he was really trying to figure out what the heck a pot roast looked like and he asked her for help.

As much as I enjoy the hilarious stories, I do avoid sending him to the store because I know it's such a foreign place for him.

What really makes me saddest is that my father loves the Olive Garden, despite the presence of six billion non-chain Italian restaurants in New Jersey.

His fondness for Jell-O also grosses me out, as does is eating a half a bottle of olive oil over bread because it's good for his heart.

A friend of mine loves microwaved chicken pot pies, and feeds them to her kids yet finds the fact I am a vegetarian unhealthy.

I could go on..

Jerzee- Once, and only once, have I ever gone to the grocery store and found the milk racks completely barren. Not sure what happened. It wasn't imperative that I pick up milk so I just shrugged it off. I wonder if your ex went to the same store, same day, same hour. :P

Several years ago, my coworker's maid would call every time she went to the grocery store with the shopping list wanting to make sure she got the correct meat requested (she was also the one who cooked). My coworker had a N-A-S-T-Y temper so I could see her concern. You did not want to get the wrong cut of meat or variety of fruit/vegetable. My coworkers was obviously irritated when the maid called. I kind of compare it to making your parents REALLY angry 5-6 hours previous, hoping they'll forget or at least simmer out through the day and not beat you raw versus getting them REALLY angry just after getting home and beating you on the spot. Unfortunately for me, my mother had a great memory! :P

My husband will occasionally do our grocery shopping alone, otherwise we're always together. He's the cook, and tends to gets the cheapest priced item. A lot of times, he decides what he's going to cook that night depending what specials there are in the store.

When he asks me to pick stuff up on the way home from work, he's often upset because I've probably spent too much or gotten the wrong thing.

We have a bakery at our cafeteria that sells artisan bread loaves. Once, I rushed out to get a loaf since they only stock 3-4 loaves of each type in the morning. When I came home, he shook his head. He wanted bread for peanut butter-banana-honey sandwiches...plus I stopped by the cafeteria on the way home and picked up a prosciutto mozzeralla sandwich, chicken caesar wrap, roast beef sandwich, tomato lentil soup, mushroom bisque, 2 bags of Miss Vickie's kettle chips, hazelnut brownie, and a creme de fleur. :P

My H thinks that feeding my kids their breakfst or lunch at gas stations (say on a Saturday doing errands or whatever) is perfectly acceptable dining. My kids LOVE eating this way.

Makes me want to weep.

They also love beef jerky, preferably purchased at Sam's in the BIG bags. Jerky looks like something I burned and then hid under my bed for 6 months. It may be ok for pioneers and outdoor types, but please....

My boyfriend was the first person I've ever known to eat at 7-11. Hotdogs, nachos, jalapenos chili and nacho cheese. Those are fine combos but I honestly never knew of ANYONE who ate at 7-11.

He also loves to chomp on the chewiest, fattiest, gristle part of his steak. He always eats it and says "Mmm. Cartilage."

BLAH.

"My boyfriend was the first person I've ever known to eat at 7-11. Hotdogs, nachos, jalapenos chili and nacho cheese. Those are fine combos but I honestly never knew of ANYONE who ate at 7-11."

Ahh, a man after my own heart.

My fiance wants to eat the craziest candy he can find. Chocolate Skittles? Strawberrry Whoppers? Random Chinese or Mexican candy, found in the ethnic aisle? All awesome, in his book.

The thing that grosses me out the most is his sushi cravings. If he's craving sushi really bad, he'll go to the store and buy wasabi and soy sauce and KRAB WITH A K and then come home and gorge. Luckily, this happens less often now that there are a couple of sushi places that have finally opened in this town.

I'm very health conscious, so it bothers me when I go home and see what my family eats - Poptarts or storebought donuts for breakfast, hot dogs for lunch, flash-frozen fish sticks or pizza for dinner.

My mother complains about her health and weight, but refuses to believe that crazy foodstuffs – like, say, *oatmeal,* could be healthier or cheaper than twinkies. Oh, and the whole family "eats healthy" because a tomato slice on a cheeseburger and a quarter cup of baby spinach covered in ranch dressing are the only fresh vegetables a person needs.

This isn't a sometimes thing. This is how they eat every. day.

DH could live on Spaghetti-O's, which I'd never had until we met. I do confess they are a good vehicle for shredded cheddar cheese though...is there anything that is not improved by cheese?!?!

@HeartofGlass & JerzeeTomato - my MIL swears by Marie Callender's pot pies. They do taste good, but I nearly gave myself a heart attack the one time I read the label (and haven't eaten once since) - first of all, one serving is HALF a pot pie (which is just stupid...who cuts a pot pie in half and serves it??) and secondly one serving is 560-some calories!!! So the whole pie is over 1000 calories. I shudder to think of the times I ate one, plus some side dishes, for dinner...egad...

Suddenly the Spaghetti-O's with shredded cheese sound almost like health food, in comparison...

@Jerzee: I can't say anything about Wawa subs. I like their turket ones. They are good.

However, my SO and I went to the grocery store for the first time last week. That will be the last too. I felt like I was with a child. God forbid I go down an aisle to make sure I didn't need anything. And I was being good too, since he was with me. He bought some separate stuff. Found out what one of those things was. I hang my head in shame as this should never be in ones refrig: individual FAT FREE American Cheese slices wrapped in plastic. Oh. My. God. Seriously??? His defense: what? It tastes good...I almost had a coronary. I am a lover of all cheese (ok, minus Swiss) and that hurt me. Badly. I just shook it off.

However, if I send him to get stuff-I have no fear. He will bring back the right thing. :)

I sometimes wonder what my husband eats when I'm not around. He likes all foods (except strongly licorice-flavored items, gummy candies/jelly beans, and tomato-juice-based non-alcoholic drinks - not joking). This is often a good thing, since he'll eat whatever is served, but again, he'll eat WHATEVER is served, and plenty of it. I do worry sometimes. He is funny about going to the store - he's not great at label-reading, but he does try. I have done the rip-off-the-label trick too.

I think if I left him to his own devices he would purchase mainly pork and dairy products. Though for whatever reason, he loves All-Bran cereals, so probably he would live.

I hate hate hate when someone buys bottled and branded "lemon juice". Just buy some lemons for g-d sake...and squeeze them! It'll be SO much better!

Hillary
Chew on That

my bf smothers EVERYTHING with ketchup... even marinated steak... i just look at him and sigh

My daughter always wants to make a Run for The Border... which I would occasionally indulge by allowing one item. What was funny though was when she'd order the "7 layer burrito" without the guacamole or tomatoes. For awhile she went vegan so it became the "3 layer burrito" (only same danged price and it was really frustrating when it was the same amount of beans, rice, lettuce as a 7 layer) which made her start eating the tomatoes and then the guacamole because it felt stupid to her even. This turned out to be a good thing because then she discovered better than TB. These days she has to use her own money for that kind of treat.

What I really hate about it all is I'm more than willing to facilitate the ability to make the burritos of her dreams at home by cooking both rice and beans and getting the other ingredients only in organics which I feel a lot better about but she never feels like a burrito when the ingredients are easily available. Part of it is I think because she can't seem to get a handle on the idea of not over-filling it so she can't actually wrap it which means eating it with a fork. Essentially she needs the restaurant to limit the stuffing for her. I am grateful though that she's a vegetarian so she's not eating the meats there.

My dad loves the little vienna sausages in a can. Blech! Same goes for the little cans of potted meat spreads. God only knows what's actually in them.

BF is a chef, but somehow manages to eat some pretty gross things. At work, he'll cook perfect steaks and this killer veal ragu, but he'll come home and eat frozen packaged grossness because he's sick of cooking.
Oh wait. Maybe I should do something about that.

My young roommate puts up with my pesto genovese, which, if you don't eat it, does look a bit like an oil slick in a swamp. I put up with her half-pound tubs of Country Crock. Live and let live, say I.

And if I really cared about any errand, I wouldn't let anyone else do it. I like control. Then again, I'm single and my child is very trusting.

LOL Josdean. You know, I adore my husband's homemade beef stew to death, but there's just something about Dinty Moore beef stew over a bowl of rice that hits the spot Saturday morning. That funky meat texture is something else. I haven't had any in a few years though. :(

Gefilte fish...can't stand the smell

My hubby brings a lot of questionable items home to eat; but then again, since I am not eating them, why judge? However, I thought I could vent a little =) Number 10 cans of nacho cheese, that he eats cold with chips. Frozen Chicken Pot pies are stocked up in our freezer like they are the next life saver no one knows about...I don't even remember why he bought so many...I think there was a sale; go figure. He also loves to douse his pizza products (slices or calzones or stromboli) in ranch dressing; not just dip a piece into the dressing...drowns it!