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How about a make-your-own pizza party?

pick another group ;)

I just got another thought. You could have a theme, such as Asian or Middle Eastern, and decorate your table accordingly to set the mood.

Sounds like the food bar/potluck is totally the way to go instead of driving myself nuts. Brillant, people, thanks!

My go-to meal is always roast chicken and a potato gratin, some kind of a soup for a first course. I'd offer a bearnaise sauce with the chicken for the gourmet-ish folks. If you wanted a salad with a very simple vinaigrette (Dijon mustard, thin with red wine vinegar, and beat in your olive oil. I use a peeled garlic clove speared on a fork to do my mixing with. Use coarse salt on the salad after you've tossed it with the dressing; kosher is fine.) instead of soup, serve it with small wedges of a really good cheese as a garnish. For dessert, how about an old-fashioned layer cake - my choice is usually a really rich devils' food with a 7-minute frosting, which is sort of like marshmallow. If you want ice cream to go with it, think banana, which is served in a separate dish, so the pickies don't have to worry about one thing "contaminating" the other.

I know you've made your decision---but I seem to get questions like this (or its sibling, "my boss is coming to dinner and I don't know what s/he likes to eat."

I don't have any ideas for a menu right now but check out veganyumyum.com for ideas, i know the idea of vegan may not sound appealing but it does have amazing recipes and beautifully presented food. Plus its more just for ideas, it would please both your vegetarian and gourmet friends. hope that helps.

http://veganyumyum.com/2007/12/chickpea-radish-hors-doeuvres/ this is one of my favorites, simple and beautiful.

A nice veggie lasagne could be a great idea, too. There are so many versions out there. Gourmet has a delicious butternut squash version with hazelnuts. Roasted mixed veggies can be great too (i like a mix of mushrooms, zucchini, eggplant, onions, and red peppers. With those, I like tomato and bechamel sauce, but the butternut squash is creamy and white.

As others have suggested---a "bar" of some sort---baked potato with fixin's?

I was going to suggest a red-sauce meatless lasagna as well - using only the highest-quality cheeses, of course! to please the gourmands. If the pickies are really picky, maybe stick to veg-free or add zucchini, which is extremely mild and inoffensive, but adds nice flavor and nutrition. The best thing about lasagna is that all the prep can be done in advance, then you just stick the thing in the oven. As for dessert, why not apple pie?

I am really glad I posted...now it's just a matter of choosing from all these great ideas. The baked potato bar idea made my mouth water -- maybe white and sweet potatoes. Italian is always a crowd pleaser as well.

I'd suggest making it a potluck (then the most controversial elements are left in the hands of those with very precise specifications), and just take on dessert, which you could do as an assortment of small things, perhaps including something marzipan-based if any of the guests have gluten or wheat sensitivities (although if these are mild, they may actually welcome the excuse to indulge in a small 'off-limits' item... or maybe that's just me).

And I know how souldawg feels, because I've often heard my vegetarian sister groan 'my choice was rice/pasta, of course...' after having gone out to dinner (also, baked ziti have dairy, and heaps of people have--or believe they have--problems with that, so it could also turn into a headache that way).

I'm another vegetarian, mostly vegan, pasta loathing person. It's awful to be served a great big hunk of heavy, doughy pasta, knowing that the host cooked it just for you, and put in extra cheese, just because of a non-vegetarian fear that I'm going to faint for lack of protien before the meal is over.

I really like the grilling/kebab idea--I think that it would impress the foodies and the veggies, and the allergic people could pick items that suited them.

If that's too complicated, you could do a kind of 'tapas' party or wine-tasting with lots of varied appetizers, like hummus, salsas, vegan and veggie dips, plus meaty stuff for everyone else.

I think the baked potato bar is a great idea, too. I'd do giant russets and yams, both.

Besides all the usual toppings, I'd offer various cooked vegetables as fillings -- I'm thinking along the lines of roasted cauliflower, steamed broccoli, sauteed spinach, etc. All cooked separately, of course, to please the finickies.

You could make it even more beefed up (so to speak) by offering different kinds of chili (vegan, beef, chicken) for fillings.

And maybe offer some small bread bowls as a base for those who might not be into potatoes.

I have sometimes gone to the trouble of presenting a dinner which would at least be intended to please and satisfy all my guests. And I'd get comments ranging from "Are you trying to poison me?" to "Yecch--who eats this sh-t?"

Many people simply have no manners. So now I'd serve steak tartar with a raw egg and salad with a garlicicious dressing. and when the vegetarians objected I'd ask them if they were wearing leather shoes. When the garlic-haters made noise, I'd ask them why they were so frightened of their own smells.

Best to meet me for dinner in a restaurant.

Oh, so many of you are more patient people than me - I'd go with a restaurant. Barring that, some kind of potluck or a make-your-pizza or salad bar.

I do really like the kebab idea that has posted though - it is pretty unique, and you could a whole Middle-Eastern theme, from appetizers and dessert to decor and music.

Wow savecara - how nice of YOU that you're trying to accommodate all these diverse tastes!

I love this recipe from Cooking Light for Butternut Squash Pie -- it has bulghur in it, and mint, and feta, and it's all wrapped up in phyllo. It's SO yummy, and filling, and it looks really fancy-pants but is actually very easy to make (as long as you have a food processor -- otherwise it takes awhile to shred all that squash). I usually double the recipe and make it in a 9X13 pan:
http://find.myrecipes.com/recipes/recipefinder.dyn?action=displayRecipe&recipe_id=1120315

For dinner parties I've served it with garlicky roasted broccoli and a salad, with hummus, sun-dried tomatoes, baba ghanoush and olives as appetizers. You can't go wrong!

Good luck!

I am throwing a Super Bowl party and have the same thing to contend with (various food aversions). My plan is to serve food that can be layered. For instance, I will make vegan chili, beef brisket and bread bowls. I will have some cheese and sour cream available. From there, vegans can abstain from bread, vegetarians can eat the chili in the bowl with cheese, and the rest of us can mix in some brisket. I have a few other dishes as well to accommodate other needs, but I hope this sample helps some. Layers of food, like layers of winter clothes, really work well.