PrintPicky-eater dinner guests
My wife and I belong to a group of about 5 couples who are all best friends. However, when we have them for dinner, here's the rub: 2 are vegetarians, but will eat fish. My wife won't eat fish. One won't eat anything that she considers organ meat or fungus, e.g. mushrooms. The list goes on and on. I love to cook, but this group is a real challenge. Any suggestions?
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22 Comments:
I am in love with progressive suppers. And it seems to be lost when it coming to dining with loveds ones. You agree to meet at "person A's" house for cocktails, then go to "person B's" house for appetizers, then "persons C's house for first course....you get the idea. It's like a buffet, of sorts. It makes for a fun evening. And of one of the group does not like something at a house, they can certainly fill up at the next! It's a fun night, but it helps if you and your friends are at least in the same area to create less travel!
Lilartist at 2:27PM on 07/11/07
Order a couple pizza's.
(sorry to be snarky but I have little patience for vegetarians.)
shea at 2:43PM on 07/11/07
Make it a family style meal with a meat entree and a veggie entree and a couple of different sides, that way people can easily pick and choose what they want.
ceforrester at 4:03PM on 07/11/07
Pizza is not a horrible idea. I recently hosted a dinner for two vegans, one vegetarian, and two hard core carnivores. I premade the dough, shaped the pies that evening, and then let everyone dress up their own pizza from an array of carefully quarantined toppings. It was a great success, and we all spent the entire evening in the kitchen creating tailored masterpieces and discussing food. (And it went great with copious amounts of red wine - and EVERYONE likes wine.) You could try something similar or declare taco/panini night. (Again with quarantined fillings.) My only other suggestion would be drunken noodles or phad tai.
Gretchen at 4:35PM on 07/11/07
shea: I understand having "little patience" for a group that makes your dinner parties more challenging, but in my experience, my friends who eat meat tend to be pickier about everything non-meat than my friends who are vegetarian. Veggies have to be more expansive in our choice of nonmeat foods - and being a vegetable-lover cooking for a picky meat-eater is probably just as tough as being a meat-lover cooking for a vegetarian.
producestories at 5:12PM on 07/11/07
Pizza, definitely. Quick pre made dough from Whole Foods. Mushrooms. Make your own tomato sauce, fresh mozzerella, ground up sausage, arugula, roast a couple of peppers in the oven, carmelize some red onion. Get some salami, pepperoni. A pizza stone in a preheated oven as high as you can get it. Brush dough with a little oil and herbs of your choice before piling on the toppings. DONE.
nelson5757 at 5:57PM on 07/11/07
My first reaction is sort of a natural selection thing; the pickier that you are, the fewer places you get invited to but as I read some other responses, I started catching the spirit. On many occations I've enjoyed meals with a "build your own" theme. Set out a basic starter, a big baked potato for example, and then let the guests pile on their choice of toppings. this can be done with a ton of optional starters and additives. It could be fun to try to predict what any one friend might opt into or out of...
czken at 6:25PM on 07/11/07
OMG, Producestories is so right. I agree that meat eaters often have more food picadilloes than veggies do. (I'm quasi-veggie.) I would suggest the pizza option--sounds excellent--and I would also say that a great chili with lots of veggies goes a long way. I've made chili with Boca crumbles and most meat eaters I've served it to could not taste the difference, once it's mixed with all sorts of beans, veggies, peppers, good spices ,etc. Make a big batch of cornbread, a big salad, and no one will go home hungry.
I also second the progressive dinner. It's a lot of fun.
PAWriter at 7:13PM on 07/11/07
I have many friends who are vegetarians and/or vegequariums (they eat fish)...I say make food for the rest of the crew AND some great veggie dishes. Vegetarians can eat all the veg dishes, non-vegs can eat both.
The vegetarians I know don't seem to care as much if there isn't a protein available to them. Then again, you can always make a dish with chick peas or beans so they do get some protein...believe it or not, one of my biggest successes is a CRAZY easy (ahem) Rachel Ray recipe for Indian Spiced Chickpea and Fire Roasted Tomato Soup. Vegetarians and non- always love it!
Curlz at 9:33PM on 07/11/07
Pot luck. That way, everyone can bring what they like, and everyone else can try it.
DaveFaris at 10:15PM on 07/11/07
Soup - lots of flavor in veggie varieties, served with crusty bread and a good salad. Or, a meal of only appetizers (some store bought and some homemade to save yourself spending the week before in preparation) - people can graze over wine and conversation, avoiding things they don't care for without making a big deal.
LizNYC at 10:31PM on 07/11/07
I second the soup idea, especially in the summer when its hot you can make a variety of different soups for different courses. I however just don't cook for people who are vegetarians, it's hard enough cooking for my gf who doesn't eat eggs or hardly any seafood other than crab and the occasional shrimp.
kitchenlove at 11:27PM on 07/11/07
I do italian suppers for groups like this. A veggie lasagne with a meat dish and a salad a bread and 2 desserts one dairy and one non dairy.
One supper I did was 3 spaghetti dishes. One with cauliflower, garlic and dry white wine and good olive oil. One with clams and one with a sauca fresca (tomato and basil from fresh tomatoes)
I also sometimes do an antipasto that is many things pesto chicken, pesto zuchinni, roasted peppers, grilled portobello mushrooms, various olives and cheeses and asparagus, some meats and some bread.
Italian gives you lots of space to move the ingredients around to suit.
Also a paninni night might work as well. You just put the ingredients out and let them put what they like.
JerzeeTomato at 1:55AM on 07/12/07
The construct-your-own theme is a good one. At my house it's usually burritos/tacos. Put out bowls of homemade guac, shredded cheese, beans, cilantro, salsa, fish or chicken (or neither), chipotle spiced sweet potato, tomatoes, lettuce, cabbage, and serve different kinds of hot tortillas. You might nuke flour tortillas and toast the corn ones (brushed with oil) in the oven.
emily20008 at 11:19AM on 07/12/07
try an ethnic spread like chinese or indian. order in from a nice restaurant. get a wide variety of items, its cheap if you are getting takeout, and everyone loves chinese. the vegetarians and meat eaters can all enjoy rice, noodles, or vegetable dishes, and you can order a couple meat entrees to round it out for the carnivores. pass the egg rolls!
(sorry but the idea of feeding your dinner guests pizza doesnt sit well with me.)
stumbler02 at 1:08PM on 07/12/07
I'd suggest a buffet of some sort of small plates items. Lamb chops in one dish, and tofu arracini in another. You can make smaller portions and still feed an army.
kitchenbea at 2:43PM on 07/12/07
I'd go with the mezze/tapas/antipasto idea -- many small plates, rather than one central dish. Alternatively, I've catered very successfully to a vegan/meat-eating crowd by making a central dish of gado-gado (Indonesian fruit and veg salad with a peanut dressing) and supplying skewers of chicken, shrimp, and tofu sate on the side. Some cold, spicy noodles and a couple of cooked vegetable dishes (bok choy stir-fried with chilies and garlic? string beans with grated coconut?) round out the meal, and you can cool things down at the end with something like a coconut-milk panna cotta.
maggiesara at 2:31PM on 07/18/07
Beyond picky -- what about the food allergy people -- the celiacs and lactose intolerant etc ... I had one friend who was diagnosed with celiac and became insufferable -- as if gluten was supposed to disappear off the face of the earth because she was allergic to it.
On the other hand, I went to Aqua in San Francisco with a large group a few years ago, and they were great about my brother's shellfish allergy -- they made sure he got something equally yummy for every course and no anaphalaxis!
Charlotte at 6:28PM on 07/18/07
The taco idea is a good one.. you could have fish tacos for the fish eaters and other meat for the non-fish eaters. And everyone can pick their own vegs to put on them..
alynn at 10:49AM on 07/20/07
I have a group of friends with similar issues. I tend to go with pasta dishes that incorporate a lot of vegetables. I have a recipe for a lovely pasta with asparagus in a lemon cream sauce that's perfect for this crowd.
But I like the idea of many small plates.
I had a diss defense party for a friend who is a vegetarian, and managed to make an entire array of foods that were fine for her but that everyone else enjoyed as well: caponata, Asian-style marinated cukes, stuffed baked Bries in puff pastry (one was stuffed in homemade tomato chutney, the other with chopped mushrooms sauteed with sherry), lokshen kugel, roasted asparagus in a lemon shallot vinaigrette, quinoa salad with black beans and corn in a lime-cumin vinaigrette--plus some dips and some cookies and mousse. Tons of food that everyone could eat!
klg19 at 5:33PM on 07/20/07
My brother is a recently reformed vegan -- he now eats fish, but still avoids dairy due to lactose intolerance. He and his wife also have a very open-minded "if we don't know it's there" policy (never asking whether the refrieds are made with lard, or the soup base was chicken, etc.). They are the PERFECT "special-needs" eaters. xoxo
My dad is SEVERELY lactose-intolerant. Truly, you don't EVEN want to go there. And he's on a strict low-fat diet for his health.
And, my stepson who just moved in with us (age 30 going on 12) is the pickiest eater on earth.
I usually do buffet or semi-self made style in those situations. Think taco salad with all the ingredients in separate bowls. Or grill a bunch of vegetables and potatoes and chicken and fish and let everyone choose.
Totally agree with the suggestion about a second main dish. Try grouping the various eater issues into two large groups and making two main dishes to address each group's needs. That's my usual solution.
Also, think simplistic. Pasta with marinara will usually satisfy even the most adamant carnivore, especially if there's cheese on the table, or a plate of sausage or meatballs to add to one's plate.
Make a hearty vegetable soup, especially one with beans or pasta or rice in it, and serve it with chopped chicken or meatballs on the side as an optional topping. Leave the veggies big so they can be picked out -- or better yet, puree them so it's not clear just WHAT is in there... ;-)
Offer some substantial appetizers and side dishes that in combination will comprise a complete and balanced meal even if the main course is declined (e.g., hummus, potato gratin, beans/rice/corn combo, etc.).
Along the lines of the pizza party, if they are no vegans on hand, make a couple of frittatas with a variety of ingredients in each (great because they can be served at room temp).
Good luck!!!
LoCo at 5:36PM on 07/27/07
of course vegetarians can survive a meal without protein, but having a separate vegetarian entree is a nice gesture. a person with a restricted diet (who may feel used to feeling like a second class dinner party guest confined to side dishes) it is likely to be very appreciative of the effort.
anyway, if your friends eat fish you could make both a mild fish and a chicken main course. you could cook them with the same method for ease and prepare them with similar seasonings, so that either entree will go fine with similar side dishes and wine. you wife eats the chicken, the fishetarians eat the fish and the remaining guests can chose between the two. some may even choose both.
for non fish eating veggies, you could do the exact same with tofu or tempeh (or portabella if the meat dish is beef).
i'd suggest having at least 2 or 3 side dishes (everyone will find one they’ll eat) and serving it family style.
klevites at 2:32PM on 08/06/07