San Francisco-based marketing experts Meth Coffee have emerged quaking from their lab with a new extra-caffeinated beverage dusted with yerba mate. This vibrationical catalyst for upstarts, earthquakes, and brain shifts is roasted for you by a master druggist, bionicalbrain chemist, and coffee viscologist within hours of receiving your order to guarantee maximum potency. Just navigating their website is making me jittery. See the I'd-be-outraged-if-this-actually-made-it-on-television video....
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