Jeno Paulucci, the man responsible for what are known today as Totino's Pizza Rolls, died on Thursday at home in Duluth, Minnesota, of renal and coronary failure, according to the New York Times obituary.
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In other Totino's "news," here's a blurb from this week's Onion.
I took this at a Woodman's* last night. I had to do a double read. Um, 120 pizza rolls for $9.69? First, that's a dirt-cheap 8¢ each. Second — what the hell are you going to do with 120 pizza rolls?!? I don't know, but I kinda want to find out.
"OK, heres the trick to eating them. Cook until they are starting to burst, that ensures a quality 'crispness.' Pick up a single pizza role by a corner with your fingers, then bite off all other exposed corners. Finally, blow into one of the newly opened corners and heat will get forced out the other corners. You can then eat immediately. Enjoy." —LLToddJ, on "Totino's Pizza Rolls: How Can You Not Love Them?"
The only thing wrong with pizza rolls is that you feel like such a damn kid eating them. Also, they are mouth-scaldingly hot just after they come out of the oven but cool off to lukewarm mehishness seemingly within the time it takes to eat two of them. They're like the bananas of the pizza-snack world: There's a sliver-thin window of time when they're perfectly ripe temperature-wise.