'Pizza Girl' on Serious Eats

Pizza Girl: Crazy Delivery Stories

[Photograph: Adam Kuban] Whenever someone new finds out that I deliver pizza, the first thing they usually ask is, "What's your craziest delivery story?" I don't have too many, but here are the ones I usually go with: I once had a very drunk dude shout "I love you" as I walked away after giving him his pizza I have seen one penis. The guy had some boxer shorts on with a rip in them. I tried hard not to look Some young teenage girls thought it'd be cute if they answered the door in underwear. I could hear... More

Pizza Girl: Statistical Analysis of a Delivery Shift: Part 3

How much time do I really spend driving during any given shift? How much time do I spend folding boxes? What is my average hourly rate per shift? I often have questions like this, and the best way I could think of answering them was to track my every movement during a shift, so I recorded everything I was doing, from my clock-out time to the time I spent folding boxes. Over the next few weeks I'm going to take that data and see what sort of useful information I can pull from it. (see also: Part 1 and Part 2) More

Pizza Girl: Statistical Analysis of a Delivery Shift, Part 2

Another important use of pizza: learning fractions and percentages. [Photograph: Pizza Girl] How much time do I really spend driving during any given shift? How much time do I spend folding boxes? Last week I posed these questions as well as gave an introduction on my method for finding out the answers (recording my every movement through a few shifts). The raw data can be found here and below is the breakdown of the shifts. Shift 1: This shift was a short one (a Friday night) at only 1 hour 44 minutes. I took 4 deliveries (in two runs)... More

Pizza Girl: Statistical Analysis of a Delivery Shift: Part 1

How much time do I really spend driving during any given shift? How much time do I spend folding boxes? What is my average hourly rate per shift? I often have questions like this, and the best way I could think of answering them was to track my every movement during a shift, so I recorded everything I was doing, from my clock-out time to the time I spent folding boxes. Over the next few weeks I'm going to take that data and see what sort of useful information I can pull from it. More

Pizza Girl's Future Geek-Themed Pizzeria

Lately the future's been on my mind and particularly that pie-in-the-sky dream I've had of opening a pizzeria. I know that reality will be far from my vision, but right now, I'm having fun coming up with visions, so here's what I've got so far (licensing concerns aside). The best part of this fantasy, and the part I'm really geeking out about, is coming up with my specialty pizzas. More

Pizza Girl: June Bug Season Is Here

Spring is in full swing here in Texas; the trees have all exploded with bloom and new leaves, the medians are filled with bluebonnets and other wildflowers, and pollen coats my car as the oak trees make their annual mad dash to create baby oak trees. It is the perfect time to be out and about, taking deliveries and observing the world. It's too warm for a jacket but just cool enough that I'm not sweating. There is only one thing that I dislike about spring: June bugs. More

Pizza Girl: What Pizza Delivery Drivers Listen To While on Duty

It inevitably happens that I'll have a delivery shift I just can't seem to get started. My energy drags, and as I slowly transfer my pizzas from the hot-rack to the bags to my car, I know there's one thing that can make this better, that can get me pumped for delivering--one particular song. My pick, and other drivers' playlists, after the jump. More

Pizza Girl: Banana Peppers on Pizza? Yes. And They Are Spectacular

I finally tried banana peppers on a pizza last night. Before then, they were always one of those unimportant toppings that few people ordered except when they went crazy on our "unlimited" toppings special. Halfway between a pickle and a pepper, they are tangy and spicy at the same time. Now I can't stop trying to think of ways to make their flavor even better. What toppings do you think would go well with them? More

Pizza Girl: Future Technology

Once upon a time, there was no GPS. This was before the "delivery fee" was even a twinkle in the Noid's eye. Cellphones were built like bricks, and pizza delivery dudes were all dudes. And in this land of my pizza-delivery forbears, drivers carried maps made of trees but most carried maps in their heads. I have no idea what technologies are to come and make delivery better, but here are some of my ideas (far-fetched or not) that would be cool. More

Pizza Girl: Scary Delivery Situations

I am lucky enough to never have been involved in a robbery while delivering pizza, but I'm acutely aware of the vulnerable position I put myself in every time I go to a stranger's house. Not only am I guaranteed to have cash and food, but I have little way of knowing if I'm getting into a bad situation (most robberies are setups). When I get there, it's a trade off between safety and time. More

Pizza Girl: Scenes from the Road

In delivering pizza I get to explore my area more thoroughly than most people. I know the shortcuts; I know which roads will flood; and best of all, I get to take in all the little things that a lot of people miss when they drive to and from work. I thought I'd share a few of my favorite scenes. More

How Much Should You Tip on Pizza Delivery?

  • $3 minimum tip. This is 15% on a $20 order. It is not my fault if you ordered less than $20 worth of pizza. Between one and three pizzas is the exact same amount of work for me.
  • Add $1 if you ordered something complicated and I got it right. It is my job to check the order before it goes out to make sure you have the right toppings, extras, and sodas. But be merciful if I didn't get it right. I will have to correct it and that means another whole trip out to your house, which is a big expense for me; I don't get extra gas money and I'm missing out on another delivery I could have taken. Even pros forget a soda now and then.
  • More tips on tipping, after the jump.
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Comment of the Day: Stoners

"Haha, I would totally deliver 'happy' pizza. Though, in my experience stoners come in two varieties as far as tips go... the ones that are too stoned to count money (this kind turns out well for me usually as they are prone to handing large wads of bills that I count until I get to the total and then smile and say "Yep, that's enough" and pocket the rest) and the ones who aren't too stoned to count money and therefore dig up exact change." --Pizza Girl... More

Pizza Girl Likes Things Squeaky Clean

Every week, Pizza Girl (Diary of a Pizza Girl) stops by with insights and a behind-the-scenes look into the world of pizza-delivery drivers. Take it away, PG! —The Mgmt. "But I'm not dirty, Pizza Girl!" [iStockPhoto/Aksam] I have found, over the course of the last year and a half delivering pizza, that I am good at cleaning. I am not blind to the irony that in my personal life I rarely clean unless I'm beyond shaking-mad. When I say that I like things clean I don't just mean that things should be "clean-enough" or "tidy." I like when counters are... More

Pizza Girl: This IS the Industry

Every week, Pizza Girl (Diary of a Pizza Girl) stops by with insights and a behind-the-scenes look into the world of pizza-delivery drivers. [Photograph: powerbooktrance on Flickr] I really wanted to do something positive for my second post here because Slice is such a positive, happy pizza-land. But as I'm writing this I can't seem to find the writing groove on anything except the battle I'm in with my employer over wages. When Adam asked me to do these segments, it was so that I could be a voice that's inside the delivery industry. I've been researching, asking around, and... More

Pizza Girl: I'm Doing It for More Than Just Money

Another day, another new voice on Slice. We've never really had someone from the pizza industry writing here on Slice, and it's high time that changed. I've been reading Pizza Girl's blog for a while now. Pizza Girl works as a delivery driver. Her blog is funny and well-written and a blast to read. She'll bring some of that charm to Slice each week. So say hello and how'd you do. —AK [Photograph: powerbooktrance on Flickr] It's easy to forget while perusing the world of gourmet, handmade, and unique pizza that most of America gets its pizza elsewhere. They get... More

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