Look Who's Talkin': Comments, Quips, and Tips We Have Known and Loved
There's so much going on in Talk and the comments week to week that we almost can't keep up. If you're in the same boat, here's a small selection of topics and responses that have piqued our interest this week.
"I think you guys should do a full tasting of every frozen/packaged Guy Fieri product, so that we can know if we're fairly judging him on this one abomination or if it's an outlier. You know, for the sake of... science."—monopod
"I'm gonna slather Donkey Sauce all over this and then I'll be on a one-way trip to Flavortown!"—Jim-Bob
"@Jim-Bob: One does not "slather" Donkey Sauce on a dessert pizza, one "splooges" it"—redfish
"'Same siders.' It's awkward for everyone else to be around these people.
It reminds me of the old station wagons from the '70s and '80s that had the fold-up seat in the very back. You'd be driving along and two kids from the village of the damned would be staring at you through the back window the whole way home.
"I'll add that the creepiness isn't just from pda although that is often the case. It just goes against convention. That doesn't mean its wrong but get in an elevator and stand facing everyone rather than the door and see what kind of looks you get."— bobbob
"@missmochi, if you're going to quote me, use the full context. I find same-siders weird (period) because "I've never seen a pair that wasn't nuzzling and feeding each other..." So yeah, if I saw your and your grams same-siding it, I might get a little nervous about what else I was about to see :-o
But really, if I did see someone sharing the same side of a booth with a grandparent, I'm sure I'd find it adorable. Even some chaste elderly couple PDA would be heartwarming.
@bobbob, great point about social convention! I've actually had to be that person on the elevator a couple of times when I was using a walker and there wasn't room to turn myself around, and it is awkward. as. crap."— akay1
"I drink mostly diet soda, water doesn't agree with me."— redfish
"Forgive me for my bluntness but there's no really great way to tell you that it won't work. As long as you leave it up to him to decide what to have for dinner, he will choose the easiest, most convenient, or most 'enjoyable' option 9 times out of 10.
As a man, I feel it's safe to admit that we're generally lazy and indifferent about personal wellness choices unless it impacts something we hold dear (e.g., vanity or the ability to purchase/play with expensive toys). In fact, mistreating one's self tends to be a badge of honor with peers (who else would brag about how much we can drink, or how many wings we could polish off?). We also place high regard on items that will offer immediate satisfaction, especially if the ramification of that choice will not be evident for some time in the future.
Skip the cookbook because it will inevitably be relegated to the back corner of a closet. Your best bet - send him a care package of ingredients & tools and explicitly walk him through how to make one or two simple dishes based on ingredients he will be able to find again locally (e.g., ramen, pasta). Trust me, if you can spoon feed him instructions for one dish he really enjoys, he will not mind cooking/eating it two or three times a week. Men are, if nothing else, creatures of habit.
To sum - men are stupid and lazy, don't give us too much credit for wanting to do things for ourselves or for having the ability to decipher vague instructions like "eat healthier". Don't try to teach your man to fish, save yourself the frustration and do the fishing for him."— Double_J