Step 1: Purchase a Bacon, Egg & Cheese Biscuit
What can I say? I actually like McDonald's breakfast sandwiches. I grew up above a McDonald's and my favorite mornings were the ones where we woke up too late to fix a proper breakfast at home so we'd grab a Bacon, Egg & Cheese Biscuit from the drive-thru on the way to school.
To this day I'll occasionally sneak off to McDonald's for a clandestine sandwich, guiltily snarfing down the salty buttery biscuit, the gooey American cheese, the weirdly spongy egg patty and the bacon-that's-not-really-bacon-but-still-delicious.
And my wife has a disproportionately large love for McDonald's hash browns. (Disproportionate as in she's small and her love is large).
Finally, just the other day, I was thinking about how there aren't enough crispy-potato-as-sandwich-filling sandwiches. Putting these three thoughts together I was struck by an idea that could be a) genius, b) stupid, or c) ingeniously stupid.
Karl Pilkington, a man with very little education, once said that "there's no difference in being genius or being a fool." You be the judge.
You've seen step one, here are the rest.
Step 2: Purchase a Hash Brown
NB: You may also receive this hash brown as part of a value meal.
Step 3: Open the Bacon, Egg & Cheese Biscuit
NB: At some McDonald's, poor quality control might lead the assembler to stick the cheese on top of the egg. In this case, remove the bottom half of the biscuit instead.
Step 4: Bite Off 1/3rd of the Hash Brown
NB: You may also tear it, cut it, or punch it off as desired.
Step 5: Place Remaining Hash Brown Patty on Egg
NB: It should fit perfectly on top. If not eat off edges as necessary.
Step 6: Place Top Back on Sandwich
NB: This is excellent to try whilst hungover.
Step 7: Profit
NB: Also works with other McDonald's sandwiches.
About the author: J. Kenji Lopez-Alt is the Managing Editor of Serious Eats where he likes to explore the science of home cooking in his weekly column The Food Lab. You can follow him at @thefoodlab on Twitter, or at The Food Lab on Facebook.