It's the middle of summer and you've invited friends over for dinner. Implied in this invitation was the promise of food, and, even worse, food that you've cooked yourself. A quick dial for pizza will probably be looked at with nothing less than scorn, and while you briefly consider trying to pass off the "good old college days theme" you realize your friends are probably too smart for that. (Note to self: Get scrubbier friends.)
So you've watched the thermometer creep up all day, silently begging it to start its decent, wondering if you can turn on your oven without turning your apartment into the hottest level of hell. During a quick attempt at preheating you actually slide off the kitchen stool while your dog shoots you a look that says, "Good God. Give it up already."
Well, problem solved. Here is an entire menu made sans stove or oven.