Serious Eats - seriouseats.com

There was a burger from Nantucket...oh family blog sorry.

There once was some marathon hamburger meat
that no one could ever beat
one day it fell
and said "oh hell"
soon the other runners said, "let's eat."

I once had a burger so rare
There was barely a charred crust there
It was so damn delicious
Juicy and nutritious
I just about fell off my chair!

Thaddius for Burger Poet Laureate!

La Freida's burger is staring at me.
My mouth craves what my eyes now see.
Juicy and rare,
Toppings all spared,
I'd have the best damn football party!

I always appreciate good beef
Medium rare with a slice and a leaf
a wedge of bleu cheese
caramelized onions to please
Not like Ray Crock, oh that fellow's a thief

A burger with cheese I desire
Grilled, seasoned and kissed by the fire
For a free one I'd flirt,
Or take of my shirt,
And hope you'll ignore my spare tire!

Turkey burgers I spit on you.
If you try to serve me tofu, I may sue
I want some ground cow
With bacon I'll allow
And the melted cheese ought not be bleu

I once had some prime ground up cow
Who begged me "Just eat me right now!"
Flame broiled 'em up
Served with fries and ketchup
All the Serious Tasters said "wow!"

The burger of La Frieda Black Label
The only snack placed on my table
Delicious and moist
on my shoulders I'll hoist
La Frieda, burger maker most able

Should I griddle, steam or char broil?
Will ketchup enhance or just spoil?
Does it need salt and spice?
Would some lettuce be nice?
Silly me, it's Black Label - why toil?

There once was a food writer from Manhattan
Whose love of burgers made him a fat man
Life with burgers throughout
He came down with gout
Now he's stuck with a Weight Watchers meal plan

A burger with bacon is quite alright
I added some cheese last night
My heart went 'plitter platter'
My wife asked "What's the matter?"
I told her my cholesterol has gone up a fright!

There once was a cow from Japan
Who relocated to Spokane
She was part Kobe
And grass-fed solely
Avoiding slaughter was her plan.

A cold beer on a hot summer's day,
With a sizzle my griddle I play,
onion, mustard, cheese,
watermelon please!
Hamburger takes my troubles away.

Ode to a Jucy Lucy, which is a burger filled with molten cheese, for those of you not from Minnesota...

Jucy Lucy all filled in the middle
With cheese coming out in a dribble
I take a big bite
Then squeal with some fright
Too hot! Should've waited a little...

There was a hungry hamburgler named Sbarro
For his lunch he needed money to borrow
He scratched his head
And then he said
I will gladly pay you tomorrow?

If I make it myself, I will grind it
But I'll eat a burger wherever I find it
A nice char from the griddle
(And some cheese in the middle)
As long as LaFrieda's behind it

This lass lived in California a while
Surrounded by great burgers for miles
When to Missouri she moved
Drivethru operators thought her rude
For they didn't understand "Animal Style"!

Bacon and cheese and beef oh my!
Please place this burger before my eyes.
Juices dripping down my hand
This is the farthest thing from bland.
Oh burger, I love your meaty ways.
With a full stomach I stare out the window and gaze.

The burger is so gastromical,
And yet it is so economical,
But most people only eat
McDonalds nasty 'meat'
Which ends up being so ironical.

There once was a burger called Chuck
He was cooked til twas nary a puck
The juices ran out
Cause the cook was a lout
Still ate 'em cause I don't give a...
darn.

I like my burgers medium rare.
Lettuce, tomato, pickle? Don't care.
But please add some bacon,
My diet forsaken,
With La Frieda's, I'll have an affair.

There once was a heifer named Daisy,
Whose last days I would hope were quite hazy.
Off to market with such fervor,
She became a great burger.
That would have been tough if she weren't so damned lazy.

A ticket popped up on the line
and as the cook the ticket was mine.
I said "What the hell?
A grass-fed burger done well?! Why must I grill for such swine?!"

The diner was known far and wide
For it’s burgers with fries on the side
Though its food was the tops
It was closed by the cops
They were serving up dogs who had died.

There was a man from Washington Street
Whose juicy meat just couldn't be beat
Then he met this girl Sue
And she knew what to do
Griddle his meat with some proper heat!

what way should i cook my ground cow meat
a way that is sure to be a treat
so a fork alone will do
the task to make it go "moo"
that is surely the best way to eat

Oh, and. . .

The succulent beef of a cow
When griddled with onions, somehow
Becomes quite a tease
When it's topped with that cheese
And served on a Kaiser right now.

And finally, with props to Saturday Night Live. . .

There once as a blogger named Adam
You ask him 'bout burgers, he's had 'em
He gave away Pat
And then said, "Oh drat,
Did I share a 'sir' or a 'madam'"?

She once tried the burg from La Frieda
And swooned when her hub tried to feed her
He gave her a taste
She ate all in haste
And it he now now hides when he sees her.

On my death bed I want a La Frieda
and I don't mean a small little pita
though my last breath I take
it's a burger I'll make
and devour it like I'm a cheetah

(Please use your internal Samuel L. Jackson Pulp Fiction voice....)

In Paris you may have to say "Please",
Or perhaps even beg from your knees.
If you depend on your waiter,
you'll get no fried taters,
Accompanying your Royale with Cheese.

Baked, fried or BBQ'd
You eat so much it almost seems rude
The staple in many American diets
You work so hard just to buy it.
my love of it caused this verse to be spewed.

When I think of yummy Black Label,
I put it right on the table,
The kids shout "Hooray,"
And then they really do say,
Let's go tell our best friends, Jack/Mable!

A burger is messy to eat
A feast that can't really be beat
You take a big bite
Of this carnivore delight
And you feel that your life is complete

Giuseppe our butcher did query us
We thought he was rather delirious
"You want some La Frieda?
How much-a you need-a
Dese burgers you gotta take serious".

Plain, cheese or in between
I love my burgers fat and lean
Pickles, ketchup, mayo, more
Hamburgers, j'adore!

Many burgers in NY are good
Including those nearby in my hood
He sells them to places
Where we line up our faces
And his beef makes us cry like we should

Now I've had some beef in my time
But all beef isn't sublime
But I tried some La Frerida's
And boy do I needa
Get rid of all the rest cause its slime!

I once found myself in a pickle.
My taste in burgers was fickle.
Then I tried a LaFrieda.
Devoured all I could eata.
Lafrieda gave my fancy a tickle!

There once was a burger La Frieda
That all of the people did need-ah
Then Serious Eats
Was handing out treats
Five pounds is a serious feed-ah!!

love a burger from La Freida's Black Label,
To feast on at my fine table,
Its up to serious eats
who will get these treats,
for I want to see if their quality is just not a fable.

There is a man in New York named Pat,
The black label blend never falls flat

Brisket, short-rib, and skirt
Dry-aged cut he won’t blurt

With seventy-thirty meat-to-fat

There once was a girl name Mabel
Whose dream was to feast on Pat La Freida’s Black label,
So she went to City Burger
Plopped down a twenty and ordered with fries and cheese,
So happy, So sweet, the best City Meat.

there once was a contest about meat in a bun
that had everyone rhyming for fun
I wrote of my love of this juicy treat
in hope of getting something free to eat
and hope i'm the one.

A farmer who wanted to BBQ
Had nothing to cook but his tennis shoe
He spotted his cow
And he wondered how
Ol' Betsy would taste on a bun or two.

He crept up to her through the pasture grass
With utensils, a rope and a frosty glass
But chased him she did
As he tumbled and slid
And landed squarely on his fat....butt.

Ol' Betsy was almost upon him now
Oh, the humility, to die by cow
He'll have to run fast,
'Cause Betsy, at last
Had his fork and his knife and some chow-chow.

There once were some burgers so great
That the group of us just ate and ate
We finished so fast
The burgers didn't last
We all cleaned up our plate.

Hamburgers deemed MOST delicious
would NOT masquerade as ‘nutritious’:
It takes bacon AND cheese
to bring ME to MY knees—
(Otherwise, they taste SUSPICIOUS!)

there once was a burger so sweet
i loved the taste of its meat
it got hot under the collar
and was heard to hollar
as i continued to turn up the heat

It is my considered belief:
That burgers should be made out of beef
Not something quirky
Like tofu or turkey
Or tabbouleh or couscous -- good grief!

There once was a lady named Mabel
Who oft' made her living at table,
'Twas nothing she served
That kept her unnerved
More'n juices dripped from a Black Label!

must i put my self threw this just to win some meat ???

La Frieda Black Label Meats
my favorite eats
potato chips and burgers....
now that's a great merger!

There once was a girl from Chicago
Who'd BBQ'd in sun or in snow~
Grilled burgers...devine!
They taste so sublime~
To her home all friends want to go.

There was a foodie who was craving something really greasy
Something juicy, scrumptious and cheesy.
Thoughts of a salad satisfied him none
All he cared for was wat fit inside a bun!
All he could think about was the meat he had to have now..
Give him the Black Label Burgers before he has a cow!

The perfect hamburger, now that's a good chew,
BBQs, picnics, other gatherings too.
There's not much better
than with bacon and cheddar,
Even better to eat them with you!

There once was a hamburger, Black Label,
That was placed on a dish at the table.
A girl picked it up
and started to sup.
And said "A tastier burger would be fable."

The very best burger 's black label
you'll eat for as long as you're able
If you have them with bacon
they can't hardly make 'em
fast enough
to keep them on the table.

There once was a girl named Mandy
who thought burgers were just dandy
serve it on rye
with a handfull of fry
it is better than candy oh my

I suck at writing limericks,
which I don't even know what that means...
But give me a hamburger,
and make sure it's lean...

lol

At the RR crossing the cowboy tried a silly feat
The high-speed express train he tried to beat
But t'was not to to be
The sad result you see
Was Cow-Boy Hamburger Meat

saxel@juno.com

The calf in the barn is a steer
They are feeding him choice grain and beer
When he reaches the right weight
They'll cut his throat over a grate
Soon the burgers will be ready to sear.

I fell asleep dreaming of love
burgers turned with a fork and a glove
with buns and some chips
passing over my lips
I exclaimed "oh heavens above"!

I love burgers so much I would live in a burger barn If I could.

La Frieda i eat ya
to satisify my need
sloppy juicy oh so
fine reminds me of fine wine

Hamburgers are Yum
Make sure you give me some
I'm not satisfied w/ one
I need to have a ton!

There was a guy from down South
Who lusted for a burger in his mouth
He never had Black Label
To sit on his table
You see he is under a drought

There once was a Black Angus cow, who said" I must eat more grass now".....He ate and he ate and he tasted so great that the cook got to take big bow. er, sorry

There once was a burger I desired
but the Coney owner has since retired
I found a new place
that was quite a disgrace
that man should have already been fired!

There was a bun alone
he called Frieda on the phone
Do you wanna get together
That smell always brings me home

There was a young lady named Clair
who found her La Frieda stash bare
so she got on the horn
on a sunny bright morn
and ordered a bunch then and there.

There was a farmer had a cow,
And LaFrieda was her name-o
Not McDonald - no
Not Burger King -no
Not La Wendy's -no
Because she as the best-o

There once was an empty bun
That needed to have some fun
With a burger so rare
That none could compare
But La Freida tried and won

There once was a Burger named King
Who had a quite scandalous fling
With a queen from a dairy
In white castle they'd marry
And used a Duncan Donut for a ring.

adrnlize at aol dot com

I once met an old carnivore
Who said just give me some more
Make mine red and juicy
Like Ricky's gal Lucy
The burger that makes me just roar.

These look so good count me in

Sandwich in one one's hand napkin in the other.
Put it all down and pick of THE juicy Hamburger.
What could be better then the HOT Juicy Burger?
HOT Juicy Burger memento to your metabolism to memorandum your taste buds to enjoy!

A Black Label burger by LaFrieda
Will satisfy the pickiest eater
Just one bite and you'll be sure
The ingredients are pure
Says Pat, I'm the #1 meat beater

-Guttergourmet

Hey Mabel, get me a Black Lable-burger

There once was a burger who met us
With garnish of ketchup and lettuce
The first bite divine
The last bite sublime
That burger was well worth the fuss.

For such yummy meat
I'm trying this feat
Of poetry writing
while my teeth I'm biting

This Jewiah Princess doesn't know
Sea Salt from a Salt Rub Glow
Yet when it comes to good Beefsteak
She knows La Frieda Beef is all it takes
To fool those who have harsh words
for her cook (though well deserved)

There once was a lad with no meal,
And his stomach, such pains it did feel!
Then, to his great relief-
A grand patty of beef!
Dining bliss did this burger reveal!

Lettuce, pickle, mustard, mayo, and jalapeno
Grilled bun oi so much fun
Thick and juicy
What a Duse

There once was a girl that loved lettuce
Who had the poor judgment to bet us
That by laying a leaf
On top of her beef
We couldn't eat sup 'til she let us

There's a Bowl that's Super at Tampa Bay
With Cardinals and Steelers ready to play
What to eat
That can't be beat
La Frieda Burgers! They're on the way!

Great for a hungry hubby
it would hit the spot
right in the stomach
hope to see a win

La Frieda's the king of the blends
To heaven your tastebuds they send
If your lucky enough
To have tasted the stuff
This burger will be your best friend

I once called myself vegetarian
But delicious meats made me feel quite contrarian
A burger and fries
Is a succulent prize
After all, eating beef is American!

There once was a man looking for some beef.
A burger was offered with ketchup good grief.
You'll have to make me another.
Rare if you please.
A toasted bun with onion, lettuce and bacon o' how my hunger has relief.

Your burger starts with a beef pattie
Not your neighbors missing catty

But don't be an oaf
And shape it like your loaf

And have it turn out like your fatty

There once was a burger so greasy,
And to my surprise it was cheesy!
I took a big bite
Of heavenly delight,
With a pickle slipped in to please me!

My cow Bessie had the prettiest eyes.
She was young but big for her size.
And when she got fatty
she made great burger patties.
Sweet Bessie was sweeter with fries.

Making a burger is like finding a wife.
full of great pleasure, never strife.
Pink center so tender and sweet
And juicy, ahh dripping meat
Just hope the buns hold up for life.

The cheese oozes out
(it's American, no doubt)
first name Lucy
simply Juicy
a taste I can't do without

There once was a chick called Big Mabel,
Who'd eat only La Freida's Black Label.
She pile her buns high,
Kiss her waistline goodbye,
And inhale every scrap on the table!

My burgers must come from a cow
not turkey nor tofu or sow
it should be grass-fed
center perfectly red
topped with cheddar and bacon - oh wow!

Some people wish they had the best meat
grounded up bones, served on a bun
not with La Freida's
no toilet you will run
all fresh and good taste
their burgers make no waste!

There once was a cow named "Z"
A burger he would soon be
He ate all he could
To make sure he was good
And now he satisfies me!

Juicy,Tender, Beefy
Melts in my mouth and oh so cheesy
Don't need no pickles, no mustard, no ketchup
These are LaFreida's Black Label
:Lets hope the Steelers can bring a win to the table....

Thanks for making me smile everyone. You guys got talent. I bow to you all.

Ground beef is a versatile meat
when prepping a delicious treat.
From burgers and joes
to spicy tacos,
for cooking it just can’t be beat.

a great hamburger is one of a kind
internationally its hard to find
either fried or grilled its always great
don't cook it to long or it might not rate
well in your mouth, its ultimate fate.

A man owned a hamburger shack
that served the kids in the back.
Once health food he tried,
nothing greasy nor fried,
'til the kids woke him up with a smack!

The steer wore a ten gallon hat,
It's arse had an absence of fat.
It claimed to be Texan,
but it's accent was vexin',
we transported the beast for processin',
Yadda, yadda, yadda,...
Cheeseburger !!!!

Great burgers are always a godsend,
The possiblities to create one will never end.
Take your favorite ground meat,
add in all you love to eat...
You'll end end up with a burger
You'll indulge in and happily fend for... Ummm

Sweet

There once was a burger so delectable
It was difficult to eat being respectable,
With juice running down my chin,
And sauces being sucked in,
The deliciousness was quite believable!

There once was a burger, so nice.
But I thought that it needed some spice.
So I added Jalapeno,
You ask, was I sane? NO!
But "HOT' is my favorite vice!

Hamburger, hamburger where are thee.
You are on the grill just waiting for me.
Sizzling and cooking while I patiently wait.
I place you upon a bun that on my plate.
You look devine with condements galore.
I take a bite and of course want one more.
Hamburger, Hamburger I cannot do without
I'm sure we'll meet again sometime, that I have no doubt.

Who makes the world's juiciest, tastiest hamburgers? La Freida's Black Label brand :) Bring on the super bowl and bring on La Freida's Black Label hamburgers grilled to perfection with all the great condements of choice with lots of snacks,salads and other goodies to go along with this main course.

I made a burger so delicious
That it actually made people vicious
It's a burger so rare
You just wouldn't dare
to serve it on any old dishes

There once was a chef named Pete.
His specialty: hamburger meat.
He patted and pounded,
Shaped it and rounded,
Until he expired from the feat.

There once was a place called “Fred’s”.
Known for the “World’s best burgers” it’s said.
With lots of hot gooey cheddar cheese.
And raw onions that will make you sneeze.
Oh so yummy but afterwards you will want to go to bed.

La Frieda's Black Label
Displayed on the table
Grilled to perfection
Personal satisfaction
Better than horse from a stable

Burgers with dill pickles and onions go so well
Living without them would surely be hell
I love them medium rare the best
Come and join me and eat one as my guest.