Serious Eats
'Top Chef' Season 5, Episode 6: It's a Wonderful Kitchen
Because we're feeling the holiday spirit, we'll try and keep our recap short this week in order to spare you the agony of what was probably the weakest episode yet this season. Let's get straight to the quickfire challenge. There's a holiday spread in the kitchen. Padma explains the challenge: create a delicious holiday meal that can be created using only one pot, and Martha Stewart is the guest chef. Martha's tip for the home cooks and one assumes chefs is a little advice from Albert Einstein—make it simple but not too simple. The chefs have 45 minutes, and immediately start stretching the definition of "one pot" meal, but no matter. None of the chefs appear to make any major missteps and time's up!
[Warning, spoilers ahead.]
Martha's review of the chefs' performances: most listened to her advice. First, the dishes she didn't like. Jeff's potato risotto was too starchy and too heavy. Martha hates the corn starch used to thicken the gravy of Eugene's Korean stew, and would have liked to have seen the mushrooms in Fabio's polenta; its grayish color turned her off. Martha really liked Hosea's paella—the taste was there and it's a dish that's truly meant to be cooked in one pot. Jamie's scallops were perfectly cooked as was Ariane's beef and her puree was as "smooth as silk." Martha has an autographed copy of her latest book, Martha Stewart's Cooking School
Time to introduce the elimination challenge. They'll be catering a holiday party for the American Foundation for AIDS Research (amFAR) where there will be 250 guests. To get them in the holiday mood, Padma invites the Harlem Gospel Choir into the kitchen. The chefs draw knives for their assigned theme, inspired by one of the twelve days of Christmas. They'll have forty-five minutes to shop, three hours of advance prep, plus one hour on site prep. Oh, and by the way, Natasha Richardson will be the guest judge along with chef Michelle Bernstein.
These are some tough themes. Pipers piper? Lords a-leaping? Ladies dancing? This should be interesting. But it isn't. Things take a turn for the worst when one of the fridges is left open overnight and all the food packed inside it goes bad. Hosea and Radhika both lose their proteins. But everyone pitches in to help them pull together a plan b (hey! holiday spirit!) and Hosea finds pork loin in the Top Chef pantry and Radhika uses her duck legs instead of duck breasts. Major catastrophe averted.
To the party! On site prep begins. The party guests are to pin a red AIDS ribbon next to their favorite dishes. Party party party. Service is over, time for the Korbel! And then straight to the judge's table. Padma asks to see Hosea, Jeff, Stefan, and Radhika. Radhika explains the fridge incident to the judges. Her theme was partridge in a pear tree and she prepared braised duck leg on toasted brioche with pear chutney and toasted pistachios. Everyone agrees that duck legs were a much better choice than duck breast for her dish. Next up is Stefan who made chicken pot pie for his theme, ten drummers drumming. Michelle says she would have thrown in a couple of other things into the pie, but she understands why he did what he did. Tom praises the pot pies for not being mushy. Everyone liked Jeff's ten lords a-leaping salad of seared halloumi and kasseri cheese with roasted beets, pears, mint, and spices but agrees the cheeses weren't really necessary. And last but not least is Hosea's eleven pipers piping smoked pork loin with chipotle mashed potatoes and apple brandy jus which is nicely cooked. Natasha announces the winner: the person with the most red ribbons, congratulations Hosea. And everyone gets a copy of Michelle's new book, Cuisine à Latina
Time to bring in the bottom three—Eugene, Melissa, and Jamie. Their dishes really missed the mark this week. All the judges agree that Jamie took her scallop dish in a really bad (slimy) direction, Eugene's dish was overly sweet and only got eight ribbons, and Melissa's dish was overwhelmed by her cheese. Overall, the judges are disappointed in all the chefs tonight. Melissa say, "I didn't find deliciousness."
Tom goes back to talk to all the chefs and says of the night's performance, "Not very inspiring at all... Cook the food that you think is going to make you win... You don't win with a deviled egg [referencing Ariane's deviled eggs six ways]...do food that got you here... No one is going home. Consider it a holiday gift."
What the?!?! Ed says, "they should have sent a bunch of people packing, what is this, it's a wonderful kitchen?" And in the spirit of the holiday, I'm going to hold my tongue and not say anything else about this episode.