Serious Eats
Ed Levine's Serious Diet, Week 44: Does Moving the Scale Help Lose Weight?
I could have moved the scale to China, but I still would have weighed 238.
Though I have occasionally engaged in the not-so-fine art of scale moving during my serious diet before Thanksgiving, it was my post-Turkey Day weigh-in (the Friday after) that sent me into a veritable scale-moving frenzy. All to no avail of course.
First, for those of you unfamiliar with the scale-moving weight loss technique, let me explain. Scale-moving starts when you weigh yourself with your scale in its usual place and you are desperately unhappy with the results. The Friday after Thanksgiving was a prime example. I hated the fact that I had gained two pounds last week. I didn't think I deserved such bad news. I thought it was patently unfair and definitely untrue. It's that final thought that the number on the scale could not possibly be right that drove me to perpetual motion scale-moving last Friday.
My first move was to shift the position of the scale on my bathroom 45 degrees. No change. Damn my sleek black Thinner scale. I moved it 90 degrees and got on again. Still no change. I moved it three feet to the other side of the bathroom (my bathroom isn't that big). It still registered 238.
I then resorted to more radical scale-moving measures. I moved my former pal Thinner to the next room, which had a wood floor instead of tile. The damn digital readout still gave me the same bad news. 238.
My final move was moving it to our other bathroom 35 feet away. Its long journey changed nothing. I had to accept temporary defeat that day. I could have moved the scale to China, but still would have weighed 238.
All that was left to do was eat in moderation all week in anticipation of my weigh-in this morning. Well, actually there was one more thing to do. Leave Thinner right where he's always been. So that's what I've done. Here we go.
The Stationary Scale Weigh-In
234. Down four pounds from post-Thanksgiving Friday. And I didn't have to move Thinner an inch. Scale-moving is so last week. Long live the stationary scale (non)movement!