The Next Food Network Star, Episode 5 Recap: Don't Screw Up In Front of Bon Appetit Judges
I really wasn't a fan of this show when handed the beat. Everything felt so sloppy, forced; the goofy personalities were hard to watch. These people are seriously on television? Not to mention a decent Food Network time slot. But I found a new way of looking at it, and now I'm hooked.
The Next Food Network Star is less a food-food show, more a spoof of everything else on the network. The focus is not on raw kitchen talent, Asian street food or four-second meals. Instead, it's like a sketch comedy group's reaction to food television today. The overstated personalities, the ridiculous do-or-die challenges (involving something of grapefruit-caliber), and our obsession with fame. Then you realize it's not a joke, but a real show with real people running on a real network's budget, which fascinates me on some level.
The First Challenge: Avoid "Delicious, Amazing, Yummy" Descriptors
Iron Chef alum Cat Cora explained why six wicker baskets were sitting on the counter. Were they going on a picnic? Nuh-uh! Contestants had thirty minutes to create dishes using secret ingredients inside these baskets. But the second part was the real challenge. Explain another contestant's finished dish on screen without using the predictable "food" words or looking lame on television—their weakness.
Most enjoyable, but also most depressing, was Jennifer's noodle-naming. While hacking at Lisa's udon dish with fork and knife obsessively, she oozed about the "linguine."
Oops, Jennifer Mixes Up Linguine and Udon
Hey, we've all been there. Sometimes I accidentally make my Alfredo with udon, so what? They're both long, stringy, and uh, noodley. Human error. At least Jennifer is personable and approachable, and her on-screen noodle glitches are even endearing. It's Lisa that scares us. Even the committee has urged her to soften up, but her squinty stage eyes came across as typically fake this episode. Even if she can cook, the lady gives off ice queen vibes.
Kelsey also entered the failing girls category. Predictably Rachel Rayian in front of the camera, she dropped every sparkly adjective in the book. Absolutely delicious... beautiful! ... big burst of flavor in your mouth! But the shimmer dissipated when her mouth flamed up. What she thought was citrus was actually a habernero pepper. Poor little Kelsey!
Kelsey's Mouth on Fire
Shane was the right balance of unannoying and still energetic, which definitely rubbed Cora the right way. "I like your energy," she declared, pleasing him to no end. Throughout the episode, he seemed to make flirty eyes at her, and we're guessing, he slipped her his digits after the show.
The Main Challenge: Make Mom Proud By Getting Into Bon Appetit
Bon Appetit editor-in-chief Barbara Fairchild showed up with her entourage of "Bone-App" editors, as they kept weirdly calling it. Teams of two had to recreate turducken, Beef Wellington or Coq au vin, what you might find in a Bon Appetit holiday spread. The winner's recipe would be published in the magazine's August issue.
On one team, Aaron and Adam were better at pronouncing "vin" than they were actually cooking it. Aaron got all Euro-fancy while Adam went simple, rhyming it with "sin." Aaron's typical goofiness again saved the day, even if judges thought this recreation missed the part about "red wine and chicken becoming one." (But remember, the show is not about the food.)
The boys were hardly dramatic compared to Lisa and Jennifer, Team Cat Fight. When Lisa's shadow Jennifer accidentally broke a bottle of apricot juice all over the still-cooking dish, Lisa looked ready to sock her. Do people really bang breakable jugs on countertops like that? The girls were forced to toss out a ruined piece of duck confit and the acorn squash, leaving Jennifer with no contribution to the dish. Lisa was steaming, but told herself, they don't like me when I'm mean, so calm down.
That's Not Sea Salt; It's Glass
Who's Safe
Team Blondies, Kelsey and Shane, have been recent favorites with judges, and sealed the deal again by dedicating their dish No-Nightmare Beef Wellington to their mamas. Kelsey should have left it at that, but also threw in her default, "I made this in culinary school" line, annoying judge Bob Tuschman. "It's like a pilot saying, I just finished flight school, I think I can fly this plane!"
Who's Eliminated
Lisa is safe. Adam should tone down his goofiness, but for now, he remains "wittily charming" and also safe. Aaron is staying too, but needs to reveal more of his "true self," according to judges.
What exactly do they mean here? That he should describe more dishes as "hoopty"?
Aaron Likes His Coq Au Vin "Hoopty"
Jennifer "Oops I Did It Again" Cochrane was sent home after mixing-up Italian and Japanese noodles, and hitting that bottle of juice too hard on the countertop. No more oops-ing for Jennifer.
Previously
NFNS, Episode 4 Recap
NFNS, Episode 3 Recap
NFNS, Episode 2 Recap
The Next Food Network Star's Lisa Garza: Love Her or Hate Her?
Add a comment:
Previewing your comment:
HTML Hints
Some HTML is OK: <a href="URL">link</a>, <strong>strong</strong>, <em>em</em>
Comment Guidelines
Post whatever you want, just keep it seriously about eats, seriously. We reserve the right to delete off-topic or inflammatory comments. Learn more at our Comment Policy page.
If you see something not so nice, please, report an inappropriate comment.
10 Comments:
Oh how I like to hear about how they're suppose to relate to the home cook.....coq au vin in 45min!! I do it all the time...and like to hear this will change your life forever......... yeah in a phsyc. ward, I kinda feel sorry for the contestants because they're being led to believe they're gonna get a good slot to showcase their cooking, bet however gets it, his or her time slot will be in the wee am or late pm, and you'll never hear from them again...
Markbb at 2:57PM on 06/30/08
"Throughout the episode, he seemed to make flirty eyes at her, and we're guessing, he slipped her his digits after the show."
Would have been a little pointless as that she is a very open lesbian...
agk685 at 3:05PM on 06/30/08
Although I suppose with the onslaught of traveling shows the host to be might actually do something similar to the first challenge, grading the contestant's food knowledge was dumb. If they really want food experts, wouldn't they have weeded the novices out with a simple written 'entrance exam'? They're obviously looking for something more, so they shouldn't crack on people they knew all along were weak in breadth of knowledge. On the second challenge, how can you not grill bone-in chicken breasts in a half hour but boneless in 10 minutes? Weird things happen with time on that show. I'm still rooting for Aaron; I like his food and he's only one I can see myself listening to for an hour, though I imagine he'll dissolve to oblivion like (most) all the rest.
DJ Dedd at 3:11PM on 06/30/08
Erin, you're right on about the intense weirdness of the show. It has sucked me in, too, against my will. I missed the Cat Cora/Shane flirtation...my loss!
Hannah Howard at 3:15PM on 06/30/08
once again... annoying tuschman and the other woman who needs to take a drink before speaking make the judging portion, unwatchable.
suburbangourmet at 3:38PM on 06/30/08
So the judges tell the cheftestants to be more personable and to share their stories. Then they ask them if (in this case) they have ever cooked Beef Wellington before. Kelsey says "yes", and remembering what she's been told, says "in cooking school". And is criticized.
How are they supposed to know how to answer the questions if the rules keep changing? ;-)
CharJTF at 4:03PM on 06/30/08
Like Erin, once I readjusted my sensibilities and expectations that this show was a legitimate cooking competition for screened, talented culinary stars, but instead a popularity contest for a bunch of eclectic, foodie obsessed personalities, I was finally able to accept it as another over the top reality show with no real redeeming value.
Boscompb at 9:38PM on 06/30/08
I find it interesting and quite telling that the thread on Anne Burrell (a real chef, new to FN) has over 50 comments, and this one has petered out after a few episodes. The realization has set in that it's merely a ridiculous reality show, not a true contest and the prize of a few shows that will most likely be unseen and the "star" sent off to oblivion, after humiliating themselves for the amusement of Bob and Susie. Food Network, how low can you go????
PerkyMac at 12:03AM on 07/01/08
Do these contestants have any idea how they're being exploited, or are their egos so huge and delusional they don't care? If it's the latter, then desperation for notoriety is one of the most unflattering and unfortunate passions a person can have.
moibec at 8:39AM on 07/01/08
I think it has to be pointed out that part of the horrible factor of this show is the editing. We have no idea what some of these people are really like or what's really going on because editors "construct" the show so things look a certain way. It happens all the time and I think this show has really egregious directors making the editors cut the show in such a way that people are depicted as having one-dimensional personalities so they can be slotted into "characters" that the viewers supposedly can identify. It's all so stupid. For all we know, Lisa is a really nice and warm person who just likes to dress up. I think Aaron is really poorly edited. There are these tiny clips where we actually see his personality and most of the rest of the time they don't make sense. Clips where he's talking about attacking a challenge or bringing his A-game and then he's fumbling around like an embarrassed child in front of the judges, it just doesn't match up to me.
rockandroller at 9:05AM on 07/01/08