Yes, I Admit It, I'm a Member of the Fat Pack
Today in the New York Times Kim Severson chronicles the struggles of bloggers, restaurateurs, chefs, food writers, and cookbook authors to control their weight while pursuing their beloved chosen profession. And, yes, though a part of me cringed at the very thought, my story was among those chronicled.
As the Serious Eats community knows, I have been grappling with my weight online for the past ten weeks in my weekly Thursday posts, and offline my whole life. So for those of you who have newly come to our community of passionate, discerning, and inclusive food lovers, let me say welcome. You will have to wait until tomorrow to see the next installment of my dieting living chronicle, but I thought it might prove useful to summarize where I've been living or dieting-wise.
I was a fat kid who loved to eat and play ball. And even though I was fat, I was a good athlete (Division III college good, not Division I college good). I pitched a no-hitter in my little league's all-star game. I was a fat high school student grappling with the loss of both my parents, and a fatter college student. I would make periodic attempts to lose weight, succeed in the short term, only to put the weight right back on. I lost a lot of weight on the Atkins Diet in college only to contract a mild case of scurvy from not getting enough vitamin C. My college girlfriend claimed not to notice my heft. Maybe she didn't, but I certainly did.
When I arrived in New York in 1973 determined to save the jazz world, I was extremely overweight. A couple of years later, when I was yet a few pounds heavier, I decided I didn't want to be fat any more. I went on a diet and lost more than 60 pounds. When I got married in 1982 I weighed less than 200 pounds. I could dunk a tennis ball, not bad for a six-foot-tall white guy.
Dangers of the Job
I managed to keep most of the weight off for the next eight years until I started writing about food. Exploring every eating neighborhood in researching New York Eats, the book that Severson referred to in the Times article as the manifesto for fatties, I started putting on weight. In an article that Florence Fabricant wrote about New York Eats, I told her I weighed 220 pounds at the time. I'm quite certain I was understating my weight by ten or 15 pounds. When you're fat, you learn early on to lie when asked about your weight.
After that story, my food writing and eating career took off. I was eating lots of food and talking about it in print, on radio, on television, and, with the birth of the internet, online. My weight took flight right along with my career. By 2005 I was heavier than I had ever been in my life.
Down and Up
I had a thin wife and a thin son, both of whom I adore, and they started pleading with me to lose weight. "I want you around, Dad," my son told me one morning. Maybe my wife put him up to saying that, maybe she didn't, but either way he (or she) was right. So I just started eating less, often eating half of what was proffered. Swearing off foods I loved wasn't going to cut it, but eating less of them did. I also played squash and swam four times a week. Within a year, I had lost 30 pounds.
But in the sea of stories and books I was writing about pizza, ice cream, cheesecake, and heroes, the weight kept creeping back. I gained back 17 of the 30 pounds I had lost. It was making me crazy. People still commented about all the weight I had lost, but I knew my weight was trending in the wrong direction.
A New Attempt
So 11 weeks ago, I embarked on Ed Levine's Serious Diet, which appears every Thursday here. I weigh in and chronicle my experiences trying to lose weight while still deriving pleasure from food, which I dearly love. Other serious eaters have joined me in my quest, my never-ending struggle to live free or die, when it comes to food.
So what Severson summarized so neatly in a paragraph in her story I have expanded upon here (that's one of the luxuries of online writing). Come join us tomorrow to read about, comment on, or join me in my struggles.
Related
Ed Levine's Serious Diet
A Writer Who Heralds the Unsung And Ferrets Out the Hard-to-Find [New York Times]
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16 Comments:
Mr Levine--- I thoroughly enjoyed the story in The Times and offer you a small way to ease some of efforts.
We have a couple of handy nutrition tools posted at http://www.MenuRx.com/NutritionTools.htm
Others have found them memorable ways to keep their diets in check.
Continued good luck in reaching your goals, but PLEASE don't overdo it!
ToTo2 at 9:53AM on 03/19/08
this is a little off topic from your own article... but, oh that article shocked me beyond belief!
"Mr. Shaw said he believes the genetic component of weight and health matter more than moderation and exercise.... Some of his views about diet and health border on the extreme. 'I think the whole diabetes thing is a major hoax,' he said. 'They are overdiagnosing it.'
...
Like Mr. Shaw, he [Mr. Ozersky] believes one’s health and size are largely a roll of the genetic dice. “I’m a Russian Jew,” he said, “so grease is mother’s milk to me.”"
What?! What?! The genetic component is a small part of the raison d'etre compared to environment. Why has obesity in the US ballooned in the past few decades? Is it because Russian Jews are suddenly overcompeting everyone in the survival of the fittest? Is there a sudden proliferation of grease/obesity/weight/unhealthiness genes? That's just not how population genetics work, and using it as a justification for continuing a certain lifestyle is misleading for others and just not that logically sound anyways.
Even if let's say you *are* genetically predisposed to obesity, that's simply more reason to fight the predisposition, just like those of us that are genetically predisposed to certain types of cancer know to get tested more often for those types.
Thank you, Ed, for having the presence of mind to tell the tale as it is and confronting the real problem, instead of using science, only when convenient.
/end science soapbox
cafepeach at 9:58AM on 03/19/08
I was waiting for you to pop up in that story as I read it this morning. As a food writer and restaurant reviewer who struggles with my weight, I was completely drawn in by the piece. One thing I thought was missing is the idea that the foods you eat don't make you fat--overeating makes you fat. And it is a million times easier to overeat when food is your life, your work and your passion. As a someone who eats for a living, I've gotten pretty good and pushing things away. (Well, most of the time.) I also keep Anton Ego's memorable line from Ratatouille in mind: "I don't like food, I love it. If I don't love it, I don't swallow." It's a useful mantra!
Joy Manning at 10:11AM on 03/19/08
Thank you for this read Ed. I feel like I avoided becoming a cook/chef because of my fear of gaining excessive weight--and I regret it. I say, if you love food, I applaud you and your ability to express that. :) keep up the good work!
hungrychristel at 10:12AM on 03/19/08
I will just say Thank You again, for spotlighting a problem that many of us have or have had, and doing so in a sane rational and entertaining way! I'm sure everyone agrees, we are all proud of you! Not just for your sucesses but for the atempts that keep us all trying!
huney_bumper at 10:16AM on 03/19/08
It is a struggle, and I admire you for living the struggle so publicly. Genetics has a lot more to do with weight than most people are willing to admit. I have a 6 foot tall white guy for a husband. His favorite foods include macaroni and cheese, pizza, and red meat. If I am not around to cook and he's feeling lazy, he heats up two microwave dinners at a time. He weighs 145 pounds. Exercises only minimally. I work out 5 days a week (cardio and weight training) and gain weight if I start to exceed around 1400 calories a day. I can't imagine the challenges I would face with your occupation - I make it hard enough for myself by being an avid baker!
peachfish at 10:23AM on 03/19/08
Call me Presbyterian or presbyopic, but I don't see "glutton" and "gourmet" as synonymous, nor "fat" and "foodie". My use of "fat and happy" as a screen moniker has always been figurative (ahem), not causal.
Fat and Happy Food Slut at 10:25AM on 03/19/08
Good for you for facing this head on, Ed! I feel the same way about Jason Perlow. Eating and enjoying it is one of my favorite pleasures, but not at the expense of overall health.
Over the years (my first diet was at the age of 8, I'm now 42) of on and off dieting, I have learned every trick in the book, and in the last decade or so have realized that I physically can't eat as much as my brain might want me to, so I don't. It's that simple-feeling so full that I can't move or feel sick isn't (pardon the pun) appetizing. I'd much rather have a few bites of everything I want to try and enjoy the leftovers than inhale it in one sitting (usually too fast, to boot) and not really savor what I'm eating. Despite my consistent battle with weight, I am, according to my doctor, very healthy. I do eat what I want to, and I also MOVE. I'm convinced this is the balance we all need.
Curlz at 11:02AM on 03/19/08
You can't know how happy I am to see this post and how happy I was to read the NYT article. As an overweight food/wine writer, I have searched the internet high and low for pieces such as this from others in the industry, that have some sort of found wisdom to offer. I'm often obstinate and if I read in a diet cookbook that I'm supposed to use no-fat butter substitute in my faux hollandaise sauce I toss the book out the window...the purist in me can't get there. And so I guess what they say is right....portion control. Thanks again.
vinovamp at 11:15AM on 03/19/08
I, too, was shocked to see Shaw's take on it. While I do realize that genetics may play some part in obesity, to blame it solely for your weight issues is a cop out.
It's been great to see Ed struggle with his diet—both online and offline here in the Serious Eats office—and to make advances through small changes in habit.
And not to take away from Ed's triumphs, it's even more stunning and inspiring to see Jason Perlow go from the over-the-top meals he once blogged about on Off the Broiler to his current healthy-but-pleasure-focused eating.
Gawker actually had a pretty damn funny take on the article: Fat Food Critic Has Death Wish
Adam Kuban at 11:47AM on 03/19/08
I think that one of the major problems that comes up here, not just among chefs or critics, but for all Americans is that we think we know about nutrition and what is healthy, but the truth is we have no idea. Look at the label of a low fat Blueberry yogurt (yes, even the organic kind) in your grocery store and you will notice that one serving of that has about twice the amount of pure sugar than a bowl of ice cream. Diet food is perhaps the most unhealthy food out there. Also, many people feel that in order to compensate for indulging on a big meal such as pizza or eating a dessert at lunch, that they should skip meals later in the day. Well, that is the worst thing you can do. The body will think it is being deprived and start storing fat.
I LOVE food and appreciate it for the pleasure it can bring and how it can bring people together, but I find it very hard to strike a true balance unless you train your palate to like (not LOVE), but be satisfied, with the healthiest of food. And, with the way American live, they do not have time to enjoy meals, so if you are going to scarf down something at your desk, it might as well be the most healthy option that exists (and not the heathiest option that is in your local subway). I eat almost obsessively healthy 85-90% of the time. This means a lunch that might be a salad with greens, a ton of raw vegetables, plain grilled salmon and a table spoon of olive oil and balsamic vinegar. I meause everything, and by now can eyeball and know the calories and macros I am eating. It means not adding the little sweeteners to foods and it means not eating ANYTHING processed. It also means knowing how to time your food according to exercise, whiich means that you have to learn to exercise appropriately. Yes, cardio is great for you, but doing hours upon hours a week of steady state cardio is catabolic. People need to educate themselves about exercise and anaerobic vs. aerobic and when to eat carbs and what kind according to when you exercise. Weightlifting is an esssential part of losing weight, staying in shape or gaining muscle. If I had the choice between only lifting weights or only doing cardio, weights would win out every time, and I am by no means a bodybuilder.
But, as obsessive as I may seem, i do enjoy food. I have learned to cook food that is unbelievably healthy and delicious, but that every ingredient is the height of nutritious. And, it means that when I do indulge, I appreciate it that much more. And, many of the things that I once truly loved because they tasted good, I have come to hate b/c I now realize what it was doing to my body, my health and my overall mood. If I am eating a meal alone at my apartment, I do not find it enjoyable to indugle. I leave the indulging to when I am with friends and celebrating and truly enjoying what I am eating and the people I am eating it with.
The people that describe themselves as those that have lost 30 lbs, then put it back on, those are the people that do not educate themselves about nutrition and exercise. Just having portion control is not nearly enough. Yes, if you ate just 2000 calories a day of pizza, you would probably lose weight, but the key is you would lose weight, not body fat. Losing weight is not just about losing weight, it is about becoming a more healthy person and feeling better everyday. I am not trying to preach, but this is what I have learned and the lack of education in this society about such a large issue is horrible.
Ed, I applaude you for losing weight, especially given the temptation that is around you 24 hours a day and I certainly don't mean to belittle any attempts you are making to become healthier. But, I think everyone who battles with their weight or just how they feel, even if they seem to be at a healthy weight, needs to educate themselves.
This is just my 2 cents and sorry if I rambled. This is a topic that frustrates me to my deepest core.
offthebeatenpath1 at 12:16PM on 03/19/08
Ed, kudos for sharing your experience so publicly. I wish you the best in attaining your goals. I am in the 4th week of my "program," and as someone who has never been able to lose weight or resist temptation, I am finally finding success and freedom from cravings. I read somewhere that failure is giving up what you most for what you want Right Now. Good luck!
missysue at 1:02PM on 03/19/08
Food critics, like porn stars, experience pleasure for the benefit of an absent audience and do so in quantities likely to eventually put their health and even enjoyment in jeopardy. I certainly appreciate the benefits and sacrifices of the former, but I remain dubious about the latter.
Fat and Happy Food Slut at 2:28PM on 03/19/08
Don't take any notice of that guy who attributed it all to genetics. Saw a great show on british tv recently where they took failed dieters who blamed their weight on everything from slow metabolisms to food allergies and genetics and everything in between. They were all brought along to have an in depth analysis of all the physical factors that may have contributed to their weight.....none had any reason for being obese except eating too much and not exercising enough. Funnily while all were a little disappointed at this it was also a big motivation to them so that they actually got motivated to do something.
Anyway, horrible negative bit over. I love what you are doing. At only 29 I have already spent 2 decades trying to balance what I love (food!) with what is good for me....which can sometimes be boring.
One thing that I have noticed is that if you really want something you should just have it and then stop. I have found that if I crave something and don't allow myself to have it because its "bad" then I end up eating twice the amount of calories of something that is "good" to make up for it. So keep the jam/jelly/whatever!
ElDee at 4:56PM on 03/19/08
What a great post! I empathize with you, too, as someone who'd been overweight her entire life. I really went out of control when I started cooking school and am finally getting it under control (for the most part, most of the time, anyway). Your weekly posts and meditations on this issue are encouraging, and I continue to wish you well as I battle the bulge alonside you!
OneWallKitchen at 5:38PM on 03/19/08
ElDee, your comment about giving in to a craving is one of the biggest lessons I've learned. I don't have much of a sweet tooth (shwew!), but when I've been thinking/talking about something (oh, say, the coffee chip ice cream at a favorite local place) for over a week, I give in to the craving. With a SMALL cup. I savor it, and I'm done.
Curlz at 9:26PM on 03/19/08