I love my wife to pieces, but I don't like Valentine's Day.

Valentine's Day puts so much pressure on all of us to show our love in so many superficial ways. How are we supposed to show our love? With chocolate, flowers, jewelry, and fancy dinners. And it's these supposed-tos that get us all in trouble because people's expectations often don't match up. Flowers from my local Korean market or grocery store might not do if my wife is expecting an expensive arrangement. My own standards would never let me give her Russell Stover chocolates.

And the fancy dinners? Many restaurateurs don't show us much love on Valentine's Day. They double their prices and offer set menus featuring supposedly aphrodisiacal foods like oysters and pumpkin pie.

So what's the answer?

I bought my wife some terrific chocolates this past weekend from Michel Cluizel just because I know she loves chocolate 24/7 and has loved it as long as we've been together (30 years). Last week I brought home a dozen terrific, inexpensive ($9.99) reddish pink roses from my local produce market, Fairway, last week. They had a wonderful fragrance, so my wife has informed me that we will be giving each other a dozen Fairway roses this year. Another reason why I love her to pieces.

As for that fancy-pants dinner? Who needs it? Maybe we'll go to Gray's Papaya for a "recession special": $3.50 for two hot dogs and a medium drink. Maybe we'll do something else. Last year we went to our local Cuban-Chinese restaurant. The point is that we'll do what we feel like doing, whether it's Valentine's Day or not. We'll save the extravagant dinner for a more real moment.

I don't mean to be the grinch who steals Valentine's Day. I just want to be able to express my love for my wife in an honest way on my own time.