Dude, Kraft Has Gone All, Like, Web 2.0, or Whatever
Clearly someone at Kraft Foods has given the inmates the keys to their asylum. In the latest example of Web 2.0 gimmickry, the company famous for its American pasteurized prepared cheese product has launched a MySpace page calling for video submissions that demonstrate "the simple joy that comes from enjoying a grilled cheese sandwich." The contest, oddly named "Have a Happy Sandwich," lets MySpace users vote for their favorite videos, with the highest vote-getter winning a $50,000 grand prize.
While I love grilled cheese sandwiches as much as the next guy, I just don't see how a campaign like this is will induce me (or anyone else) to buy more Kraft Singles. Then again, the page has attracted more than 2,000 "friends," so what do I know? For me, though, the proof is in the videos, some of which are just too painful to watch.
Granted the contest called for videos only 10 to 15 seconds in length, which isn't exactly enough time to move me emotionally or anything, but give me 10 to 15 seconds to talk about a REAL good cheese—like Sweetgrass Dairy's double-cream Green Hill Camembert—and I promise the results will be more appealing than this drivel. (To be fair, here's one that's kind of cute.)
I'm willing to admit that Kraft Singles make a decent grilled cheese sandwich, but only from the standpoint of texture. In fact, one of the main reasons James L. Kraft created American processed cheese way back in 1911 was to make a good melting cheese. When real cheddar melts, the butterfat tends to seep out of the curd in a greasy puddle. Processed cheeses contain added emulsifiers that help maintain a smooth consistency when melted. However, when it comes to taste, the stuff fails miserably. Which is why I much prefer to make my grilled cheese sandwiches with a nice aged Comté or Gruyère, or even a raw milk Taleggio. Those cheeses melt well AND taste good. Why bother with the plastic stuff?
What goes on your grilled cheese? Are you a Kraft Singles purist, or do you go for the fancy stuff?
About the author: Jamie Forrest publishes Curdnerds.com from his apartment in Brooklyn, New York, where he lives with his wife, his daughter, and his cheese.
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15 Comments:
I think I'll save the time spent viewing whatever videos are on the MySpace page and read Marlena Spieler's book on grilled cheese sandwiches instead. :)
Karen Resta at 10:56AM on 12/04/07
Like a lot of things in life, I can go both ways on this one. That came out wrong :-) Anyway, sometimes a slice of Kraft on some Wonder bread is very comforting. Especially when it's made by your mom and served with a bowl of Campbell's tomato soup.
I also enjoy some of the cheeses you mentioned, although I have no problem with cheddar on a grilled cheese if you cook it over low heat. It doesn't break so much if you go slow.
Dominic
the zen kitchen
dvchurch at 11:01AM on 12/04/07
Wait a minute. A fifty-thousand dollar grand prize?
I have an idea for a video. :)
Karen Resta at 11:16AM on 12/04/07
A nice sharp cheddar and a scraping of chipotle chili spread. Yum! :)
sarahdlr at 11:19AM on 12/04/07
Then again, the page has attracted more than 2,000 "friends," so what do I know? For me, though, the proof is in the videos, some of which are just too painful to watch.
They are giving away a chance to win a videocamera to those who sign up as "friends".
Amusing site. Particularly the post by one of the video competitors who asks "please vote for my video" with his personal photo posted as he looks into the eye of the camera with a (supposedly) sultry look and no shirt on.
Cheesey?
Heh heh.
Karen Resta at 11:28AM on 12/04/07
I cannot stand plastic cheese! It does not come into my house! As an extra old cheddar is my favourite cheese, I put that into my grilled cheese, and don't find too much trouble with it separating.
psychsarah at 12:06PM on 12/04/07
My favorite cheese to use in a grilled cheese sandwich is muenster. It melts very well and has a really good buttery taste. But when in a pinch the good old diner down the street with the faux kraft cheese can be really comforting as well.
hoosier cook at 12:09PM on 12/04/07
My friend loves cheese, all calibers, so for her birthday last year we had plenty of liquids to drink, then engaged in a Kraft singles eating contest. Waking up the next morning was pret-ty gross..
Erin Zimmer at 12:39PM on 12/04/07
I do not like Kraft Singles. Nothing called cheese food or cheese product can be good, right? What the heck is cheese food??? My understanding is that they have to add the word food to the end because there is less than 50% cheese in the "cheese product" rendering it something that can longer be considered cheese. The weird, floppy, plastic-like texture, and the fact that it doesn't change shape when melted (now THAT'S scary), do seem to back this up.
BUT. I admit that I really do enjoy an old-school grilled cheese made with "real" American cheese (note the absence of the word food at the end). Especially with tomato soup (but not Campbell's).
In Kraft-ese, this would be Deli Deluxe slices, but the stuff made by Boar's Head is far superior.
LoCo at 1:17PM on 12/04/07
@Karen: good catch on the camera giveaway--can't believe I missed that! That's a great way to attract friends, though, I think I'll try it in my personal life.
jamieforrest at 1:44PM on 12/04/07
What LoCo said. You have to get the Deli Deluxe non-plastic-wrapped cheese slices if you want that classic American cheese sandwich. Singles are just gross.
That said, I will put pretty much any cheese I can find between two pieces of anything breadlike (bread, tortillas, pita) and heat it up.
coffeecake at 2:57PM on 12/04/07
@Karen: good catch on the camera giveaway--can't believe I missed that! That's a great way to attract friends, though, I think I'll try it in my personal life.
jamieforrest at 1:44PM on 12/04/07
Add the other thing that guy was doing (posing seductively with no shirt on) while giving away videocameras and really, you can't lose. Sort of like that great chefs with their blenders ad campaign. No, wait. Give away videocameras with one hand and cheese samples with the other. :)
To answer your question I do like the traditional American cheese for a sandwich once in a while. But I think they put some drug in the stuff, some sort of relaxant - because I always want to immediately take a nap afterwards. American cheese always makes me feel drugged and sluggish, rather stupid or rather more stupid than usual.
Seems to me that middle-of-the-road cheeses do well in grilled sandwiches. Lesser cheeses will be improved by being in a grilled sandwich, and great cheeses should stand alone - never to hit the grill.
Karen Resta at 3:25PM on 12/04/07
I just made the "french onion grilled cheese" i saw tom colicchio do on the today show the other day. caramelized onions in between gruyere. i made way too much onion, though, so i'm looking for uses!
UrbanPug at 11:16PM on 12/04/07
This one isn't bad. Honestly, users sometimes come up with WAY better ads than what agencies get paid top dollar to do. $50K is a bargain for the rights to this if you get even one good one.
ExpatChef at 5:51PM on 12/05/07
ah, and Gouda or White Cheddar Dill. With Applewood Smoked Ham.
ExpatChef at 5:52PM on 12/05/07