Weird Fortune Cookie Collection
Out of all the times I've broken open a fortune cookie at the end of a meal, never had I ever come across a fortune worthy of being part of the Weird Fortune Cookie Collection. Why do I keep getting all those boring, unhelpful fortunes telling me that I will have good luck or happiness? Why can't I get ones filled with true wisdom, such as "Life is a wiggle," "You love Chinese food," or "Alas! The onion you are eating is someone else's water lilly"? I won't stop eating fortune cookies until I am blessed with one of these life-changing nuggets of wisdom.
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3 Comments:
If this wasn't living in my office at home, I'd post the scan. Worst fortune I've ever gotten was about a week or so after a particularly vicious dumping by an ex-girlfriend.
"Remember, there are always other fish in the sea. Not as rich, or as pretty, but fish nonetheless."
Yeah. Awesome. Thanks, fortune cookie dude.
corycm at 6:41PM on 07/16/07
I was once at a table with someone who got a line from Hamlet, "God has given you one face and you make for yourself another." Boy, was she mad!
thepictsie at 7:28PM on 07/16/07
How about "Inspected by number 23"?
I didn't really get this, but I once cracked up a waiter by pretending I did...
emily20008 at 10:06AM on 07/17/07