385 dph ("donuts per hour") is how fast the Belshaw Donut Robot 42 churns out donuts. Derrick bought one of these bad babies on eBay and documented the robotic donut making process for the rest of the world to behold.

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This section is best described as the beaches of Normandy on D-Day, as long as 'D' stands for Doughnuts, like in 'Doughnut Day'. The doughnuts climb this ramp relentlessly, pulled along by the doughnut chains. Now, you could be the German defense forces preventing the doughnuts from making a beach head, but no matter how big your belly is, 6.5 donuts per minute are going to eventually overwhelm your defenses. The ones that come after the initial assault pile up in whatever doughnut collection device you have to collect them. I used my turkey roasting pan.

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