How to Be an Asparagus Superstar is an essay by Phoebe Nobles from the upcoming book Alone in the Kitchen With an Eggplant: Confessions of Cooking for One and Dining Alone, edited by Jenni Ferrari-Adler. What is an asparagus superstar? Someone who fully embraces the vegetable and commits to eating the as long as it's available at your local farmers' market, which turns out to be two months in Nobles' case. Also, you must not have an aversion to asparagus pee.
Perhaps I should have admitted from the beginning that there is something I love about asparagus aside from the miracle of spring, and even aside from its deliciousness. I love the pee. Nothing seems to redeem the workings of the digestive system like asparagus. It's another verification, after a long winter, that I am alive. Natural processes are working! In fact, what the human digestive system and asparagus do to each other, each proclaiming itself, seems downright heroic.
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